


The Queen of Books

by HailSam



Series: Queen of Books [1]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell (Undertale), Alternate Universe - Underswap (Undertale), Alternative Universe - Kingdom, Dom Underfell Sans (Undertale), Dom/sub, Domme, Femdom, Inspired by Hallmark Christmas Movies, M/M, Parent Sans (Undertale), Previous Skeleton Pregnancy, Secret Identity, Skeleton Pregnancy (Undertale), Skeleton Sex (Undertale), Sub Sans (Undertale), book shop, eventually, mwahah, sub underswap sans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:42:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 36,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22070503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HailSam/pseuds/HailSam
Summary: Red moves back home with his tiny tot of a son, owning a book shop and expecting just the normal ins and outs of every day life. An out of towner comes in, and Red only expected a little flirting, maybe some teasing but not a sudden and swift change to everything he's ever known in his life!(Based on all Hallmark movies everywhere)
Relationships: Gaster/gaster, Papyrus/Papyrus (Undertale), Papyrus/Sans (Undertale), Sans/Sans (Undertale), W.D. Gaster/W.D. Gaster, more probably - Relationship
Series: Queen of Books [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1686166
Comments: 303
Kudos: 144





	1. Do You Know Him?

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me:  
> https://twitter.com/sassyhaillive  
> https://www.pillowfort.social/HailSam  
> https://sassyhail.tumblr.com/
> 
> If you need on Pillowfort or even an invite here, let me know I'll help you out :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red's day is usual until someone comes in asking for Blue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess what movie I watched last night.
> 
> Betcha can't. Just try.

_Ding ding_.

The wooden door of the small book shop opened, letting in a warm draft of air from the outside. A skeleton with blue eye lights, blue boots and a white shirt with blue shorts came in, a permanent grin on his face. His eye lights scanned around, perking up as he saw the desk near the middle of the book shop. The book shop itself was pretty crowded…but with books, not people. 

Some were stacked up and tottering menacingly, most on shelves or in a glass case. Some looked pretty common with ripped covers or slightly waterlogged, while others were painstakingly taken care of to the point they looked brand new despite being decades old.

At the desk, another skeleton flicked through a small magazine with interest, his eye lights flicking up at the sound of the bell. He had bright red eye lights, a soft red sweater with shorts and a pair of old sneakers. He perked up, grinning with sharp teeth as he sat up. “Heeeey Blue~” he purred out, cupping his head in his hand as he leaned on his desk.

Said Blue hurried over, leaning on the desk with a bright grin. “REDDY~!” Blue’s voice was slightly high pitched, but held an odd accent to it, nearly like his words were rushing out over each other in a race to be first. “IT’S GLORIOUS TO SEE YOU AGAIN!”

Red snorted, sticking his tongue out playfully. “Yeah so you say. What, were ya bored enough to come see me?” he teased, but before Blue could answer a small body rammed into his legs with a loud ‘HI-YA!’ Red flustered, leaning over the desk. “Boss! I thought you were over this!”

The small skeleton wrapped himself around Blue’s legs with a scowl. He looked…similar to Red in a way, with a longer skull though and wearing a striped sweater, along with holding a balloon sword. “NO, MAMA, I’S A KNIGHT!” he chirped, beating at Blue’s legs as Blue picked him up.

“LITTLE BABYBONES! I MISSED YOU TOO!” He cooed, kissing a grumbling Boss’ face. Boss whined, swatting at him again.

“NO! NIN’A STOP!”

Red huffed, rolling his eyes with a flush as he reached out to snag Boss away, hefting him on his hip. “Sorry Blue, he still thinks you’re a ninja for. Some reason.” Boss pouted, plopping his head on Red’s shoulder as he still pointed the balloon sword at Blue who laughed heartily. 

“AH, I’M NOT INSULTED! A COMPLIMENT, SURELY!” He tapped at the sword with a grin. “VERY FRIGHTENING, DEAR!” Blue’s watch chirped and he frowned, sighing dramatically. “THE PEOPLE, THEY CALL ME, AWAY ONCE MORE~” He groaned, plopping his head on Red’s desk as Red snorted.

“Go on then, you better come over tomorrow then, make it up for leaving so fast.”

Blue perked up, agreeing, and blew a kiss at the both of them before he spirited away as quickly as he arrived. Red snickered, kissing Blue’s cheek. “Fussy baby, come on, he can’t stay around all day.” Boss whined, patting at Red’s face with a huff.

“MAMA, THE NIN’A SO FAST,” he whined, before squirming to get down. Red chuckled, letting him down to go toddling around the books again. He wasn’t sure why Boss was so adamant on Blue being a ninja, but it was kind of adorable.

Well, back to what he was doing before Blue came in: reading through a gossip magazine and wishing someone would come in to buy something.

—————————————

Red’s hometown was Jaxx. Jaxx was a semi-sleepy little town that had started to bustle up over the years. Red had left Jaxx to go to college, wherein he met someone and they…did things out of order. Dated. Had sex. Ended up pregnant. Decided to marry.

Then ah. Then he disappeared. Or died? No one ever really knew. Just a police officer showing up one afternoon while Red had a baby on his hip saying how they found his car in a ditch but no other sign of his…husband? Fiance? Whatever they were. Honestly, Red had shoved that whole horrible experience to the back of his mind to prevent breaking down.

So you know, he came back home. He didn’t want to bum off his dad, especially considering he was traveling around now that he was an empty nester. He assured him he’d be alright, and he was. He somehow got in the business of a little book shop, his immense love of old and wonderful books filling the walls in no time.

Thing was, not a lot of people felt the same way. At first, he was a novelty. People came in, bought small comics, or trading cards, or just some book from long ago they remembered but couldn’t find again. Some of them came to see the baby, then toddler. Now…the novelty had worn off after about a year or so.

He still had yet to tell his dad. But honestly? He didn’t have enough to keep going. 

The shop was paid off, had been for a few months. But eventually he’d be bleeding out money, no way to buy groceries or pay for his electric…no rent since he lived upstairs with Boss but…

They were already struggling. He refused to let Boss go hungry, thankfully he was still young enough to breastfeed, but he was quickly gaining the idea of being a ‘big boy’, which meant holding onto many little carrots and stuffing his face. A darling image, truly, he just had to keep a stack of veggies and they’d be fine.

For now.

He already double checked everything. This next month, they’d be horribly in the red. Hah. Red. Heh. 

Blue would find that funny.

Speaking of, the sudden visits of the newcomer in town kept Red’s mind off things. He was funny, charming, adored Boss (who liked him back even if he didn’t say so), and they flirted here and there when he came in. No dates, not yet, but…maybe? Maybe.

Red just didn’t have time right now, not that he thought Blue would anyway.

Red sighed, putting away the papers he was writing down figures on, folding them up and pushing them across the wooden table. Too much stress for tonight. For now, he cut off the light, ducking into the bedroom where Boss snored in their bed in his Cars pajamas.

He had a bed, a nice racecar one his grandpa gave him, but Boss liked cuddling up and Red couldn’t say no to that face. Too cute.

He tucked Boss close, tucking the blanket around them with a sigh, kissing the toddler’s head. “It’ll be okay,” he mumbled, shutting his eyes.

It had to be.

——————————————

A strange man comes into the store. He has a bowler hat on, in a suit and tie, and randomly picks up a book to flip through. Red knows it was random as he’s not even glancing at the pages, rather he’s looking around slowly, as if searching for someone. Red raises an eye ridge when the man makes a beeline for him. Okay, maybe he guessed wrong…

“Ah, hello, hello,” the man bobs his head. He has an accent, like Blue’s in a manner. “You ah, you are Red? Caretaker here?”

Red chuckled, sitting up and stashing away his magazine. Gotta look professional after all. “That’s me, how can I help you?”

“You know P-Blue yes? Yes? Blue?” The man’s way of talking is…very odd, to say the least. His mustache ruffles every time he speaks.

“Um. Yeah, he comes in sometimes. Are you looking for him?” Maybe Blue had a meeting but failed to remember? He did that sometimes, or so he said. The man just bobbed his head back and forth, as if thinking.

“Non, no, no. Merely wondering, yes.” At that moment Boss came toddling into view with his balloon sword, obviously deflating now that he knew it wasn’t his ‘ninja playmate’. The man gasped. “Oh! Hello, tiny one, yes.” The man waved. Boss stuck his tongue out.

Red huffed. “Boss, be kind. Sorry sir, he just likes playing with Blue a lot,” he chuckled as the man merely shook his head, smiling. 

“Not a worry, yes, good. He visit often then? To see you and baby?”

“Well. Yeah I suppose?” Blue started visiting at the beginning of…Spring, now that he thought about it, when Boss was just starting to toddle about. “Are you friends with him or something…?” The man just shook his head, but looked delighted with everything he had learned, quickly paying for the book and with a tip of his hat, he nearly skipped out of the book shop. Boss toddled behind the desk, grunting as he climbed up onto Red’s lap.

“WHAT DAT?”

“Dunno, buddy. He was weird, huh?” Red kissed Boss’ cheek, making him squeak and squirm. Very weird. He’d have to remember to ask Blue about it.

(He forgot, mostly since Blue had brought in a book filled with chocolates and a balloon shield for Boss. Then they proceeded to flirt while Boss tried to ‘defeat the ninja’. A pretty great day in Red’s opinion.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look. I have. A soft spot.
> 
> And an itch.
> 
> Also I've been kinda lagging due to biology jazz but I'm slowly bumping back up aaayyyyy
> 
> I can't decide to make Blue French, Italian, or just make up a language with a very nice accent bc I'm crud at languages, yo.


	2. Vacation...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it cliche? Yes. Is it fast? Yes. You should really watch a Hallmark movie, they don't go slow. Literally. A Christmas movie contains a meeting and a wedding all in the same month, like, for real.

Red nearly puts the whole strange incident out of his mind until Blue shows up, all aplomb and grace as he swings Boss up into his arms, allowing the toddler to swat him with the balloon. Blue’s face goes white when Red mentions the odd man, and laughs nervously as he bounces the baby bones. “O-OH HOW VERY ODD INDEED, OH YES.”

Red snorted, rolling his eyes. “Uh huh, that’s why I brought it up.”

Blue laughed again, and easily swept it away as he started talking about his lazy brother and how he had gotten interested in playing with small sailboats. Ah well. Maybe it was an embarrassing relative. Not that Red could judge him on that one, hah.

So, you know, Red ignores the whole thing. It’s not the weirdest thing to have happened to him. No, that would be the weird drunken human who came stumbling in that one, crying about some other person’s book shop burning, then somehow springing back into ecstatic happiness at thin air and rushing back out.

Certainly a weird one.

Except then a woman came in, wearing a soft sweater and skirt with large sunglasses, and in a stilted dialect that sounded akin to Blue’s, asked Red if he wouldn’t mind letting her take a photo. Red gestured at his shop. “Sure sure, go ahead.”

“Non, non!” She waved her hand, gesturing at the toddling baby that scrambled behind Red’s desk. “You and bambino, yes? Please?”

Weird request, but who could say no to a cute baby? Red shrugged, leaning down to pick a fussy Boss up and cradle him close. “Sure, how’s this?”

The woman squealed, adjusting a large professional camera and snapping a photo. Boss leaned forward, poking his balloon at her. “I BOSS!”

“Ah bambino,” she chattered something in her language, reaching out to pat the balloon and then blew him a kiss. “Grazie, Principessa, grazie.”

Red laughed a little nervously, but bobbed his head. “No problem, heh. You uh, looking for a book?”

She ended up buying a small little journal like book he had lying around, and with a cheery wave she headed back out into the scorching day. Red shrugged, shifting Boss in his arms to go and lay him down for a nap. It wasn’t too unusual for tourists to snap pics of the small toddler, and the news did once during some festival.

He didn’t raise this up with Blue, as he assumed this had nothing to do with him. Two days passed, in which Red went from selling a book or two, scanning Instagram, taking pictures to send to his dad, and so on, until Blue slammed into the shop, pushing the door shut behind him and holding his body against it. He was panting and Red blinked as Boss ran a beeline to him, swatting at Blue with his toy. “Uh. Hey?”

“RED!” Blue squeaked out, hefting Boss up onto his shoulder as he held himself nervously at the door. “VERY BAD THINGS, VERY BAD!”

Red frowned as Boss squirmed angrily at being ignored, poking at Blue’s face. “Uh. What happened? Was the ice cream place out of foam again?” He chuckled nervously. Blue was so upset about that last month. But he shook his head, peeking out the nearby window-around a pile of books-before quickly locking the door and skittering over to Red’s desk.

“AH, YOU HAVE NOT SEEN INTERNATIONAL NEWS?”

Red shook his head. “I barely look at it anymore, just pretty annoying stuff, why?”

Blue shuffled the baby in his arms, kissing his cheek in apology for ignoring him before bringing something up on his phone. “AH, WAIT,” he muttered, tapping a few times, sheepishly turning the phone to Red. He squinted, leaning in.

“Hey that’s us!”

It was Red and Boss, the photo the lady took a while back. Ugh, there was a small stain on Red’s sleeve and Boss’ striped pajamas had a snag hole on the elbow. Not the best phot-wait. “Wait. Why do you have it?”

Blue gulped, laughing nervously. “A-AH, WELL, LONG STORY, YES-”

“And why is it on a news site?” Red leaned in, reaching out for the phone as Blue squeaked. 

“YOU SEE…!”

————————

‘Prince Blue and Papy of the great land of Tirla went on holiday these past few months. As per usual their holiday spots were kept private so as to ensure both their safety and their ability to relax away from photographers. Until now.

‘Reporters found they were in the small town of Jaxx, and it led many citizens curious as to why the royal family would choose such a mundane little town to reside in for their holiday. 

‘It has now come out that Prince Blue has had a secret family all along! One citizen, intent on perusing the town to their pleasure, wound up seeing where Prince Blue had frequented. “I went in,” he said excitedly, “and there was the owner! A very beautiful skeleton for certain, and to my surprise, a little baby! Toddles up, all energy like Prince was when he was that age!”

‘Here in the photo, one can see many similarities to the Prince and his heir from that age.’ _image of a small skeleton in regal garb next to Boss’ image of him in Red’s arms_ ’We’re all in a right fit about when the new royal family will be brought to Tirla to take their places next to the Prince! Many are wondering what the King has to say about this, but no word has been received.

‘Some citizens are even against the choice Prince Blue has made, as no one is quite certain who this mysterious skeleton is and what it could mean for the kingdom…’

————————

Red has to close his shop up early. Not for the residents of his hometown, no, none of them were quite interested in international news. He highly doubted any of them even checked the news online much less on paper. No, things would have been fine if it hadn’t been for the sudden uptick in people visiting…which also would have been fine if they hadn’t been keen on trying to _touch_ Boss, his hand or his cheek or just his shoulder! As his mother, Red had to keep him safe, even from well-meaning weirdos.

Well, no, they weren’t well-meaning, they were being highly annoying and intrusive. Blue had apologized, several times, both for not telling Red who he was and for everything that was happening.

Which, Red took his apology for the first. They weren’t exactly deep in a relationship, albeit he had hoped so, eventually. (Although, if they HAD been dating and it had never been brought up, Red was pretty sure he’d lock Blue out of the bedroom.) He was a bit sore on the second part, you would think as a Prince, Blue could keep the crowd away but nope. They just wouldn’t _quit_.

So, yeah, he closed. It cut into whatever profit he would’ve made that day, but it was worth it not having to deal with curious pokers and keep his son safe. He fills the day with chores, dragging Boss to the store and promising the grouchy baby a small book in return for not fussing as much. (Yeah he’s the bribe type of parent, YOU try and keep a cool head while a near two year old whines in the parking lot and several out of towners gasp and watch as if you’ve committed an egregious sin. Not that he quite cares, but he didn’t want to make things worse.)

He tried not to sigh as loud as he wanted to when Blue appears. Red doesn’t drive, no need to since the store is just down the block from his home, but he wished he had a car so he could lock himself inside away from the obvious awkward talk. Instead, he pushes the stroller with groceries underneath to walk. “Blue,” he grunted. Boss squealed, waving his hand up at Blue.

“NIN’A!”

Blue smiled nervously, twiddling his fingers together as he walked beside Red. “AH, YES, HELLO…I-I TRULY AM SORRY.”

Red groaned, rolling his eyes. “Could ya quit apologizin’ already,” he grumbled, pushing the stroller over a bump in the sidewalk. “Sheesh. It’s. Fine, I guess.” He huffed. “They’ll leave soon enough, rigth?”

Blue made a noise, bopping his head back and forth and Red frowned, looking at him. “What?”

“MY…FATHER WANTS TO MEET YOU!” he chirped out. Red snorted, averting his eyes back to the sidewalk to keep an eye on the bumps.

“Okay? Sure? What, he wants ta meet at the cafe or some sh…uh, stuff?”

Blue laughed nervously, clearing his throat. “M-MORE THAT HE’D LIKE YOU TO VISIT TIRLA OFFICIALLY?”

Red scoffed, shaking his head. “That’s like, an entire ocean away, Blue, I don’t think so. Can’t afford the effin’ trip anyway.”

“…FATHERSENTAPLANE,” Blue squeaked out, slowly sliding deeper into the collar of his shirt as Red’s glare deepened.

“ _what_.”

Blue whined, shoulders slumping lightly. “PLEASE, RED? P-PERHAPS IT WILL CLEAR THINGS UP!” He laughed nervously. “B-BESIDES! DIDN’T YOU SAY YOU WOULD LIKE A VACATION? YES?”

Red scowled, huffing as he rolled his eyes. “You know what? Sure, why the heck not.” Blue seemed to perk up but Red sent him a smug look. “You get to deal with a cranky toddler on the plane.”

Boss squealed at hearing they were talking about them, and it didn’t seem to affect Blue as he nodded eagerly.

(And no that didn’t warm Red’s soul a little at how taken Blue was with his tiny son, not a single bit at all, and not when Blue sweetly offered a small doll to Boss who acted as if it was the single best toy in the entire world.

Nope. Not at all.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Red: I work hard I fucking DESERVE a vacation  
> Blue: YES OF COURSE :D  
> Red: you're gonna regret this
> 
> (Boss ends up being an angel on the flight)
> 
> Yeah Blue's dad doesn't believe the rumor exactly, but dammit. There's a baby involved. He wants to SEE THEM. 
> 
> Also today was NUTS but Tomorrow no one bothers me so I get to take my laptop in *so there*


	3. Dad's Here!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red calls his dad. Fell makes a choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes in those movies something happens and the other person is like 'oh okay but so and so is coming with so I'm not alone' and the first person gets fucking mad??? Like fuck you too if you can't be a grown adult and realize that sometimes people are uncomfortable being out with someone they don't know well and wanna bring someone they trust with.
> 
> also pro tip: if you're meeting someone for the first time or if you're just uncomfortable tell them you're bringing a friend/sibling, hell bring your damn parents, if it means the difference between a slightly awkward first date that'll be told about at your wedding and being murdered bc you felt it was too silly to bring someone along, then dammit take the embarrassment, folks!!!!
> 
> Idk why I'm up about this lmao

There was only a handful of times in Red’s adult life that he called his dad crying. The first time was when his dorm’s lights went out during a terrible storm, and he honestly felt like he was about to be lifted off into the air. The last time was when Boss’ father went missing, an hour after the police had visited him and only minutes after he laid Boss down for a nap.

He’s pretty sure that out of all the times he’s called, that one was truly the most terrifying for the both of them.

Red could barely hold it together, and Fell couldn’t soothe his son’s broken heart no matter how hard he tried. Eventually he just packed up the RV from the Grand Canyon where he had been staying and shoved his way into Red’s home, helping him pack up to get somewhere better for the both of them.

The town Red had lived in wasn’t bad, necessarily. But it truly was a college town. Part time jobs. ‘Party goers’. The public transportation was okay, but was hard enough tugging on a baby carrier much less a stroller. Red wouldn’t have survived as long as he had if he hadn’t moved back home.

Most likely.

This time he didn’t call crying. Mostly since there was nothing to cry about. It really didn’t upset him that much, just annoyed him more than anything. He had Boss in the tub, trying to distract him with water crayons as he held the phone in the crook of his neck. “So I guess I’m going, just didn’t want ya ta come by and no one’s here.”

“Oh that entire thing sounds ludicrous,” Fell responded and Red snickered. He had to agree but it’d be fun to fly in a plane…and spend time with Blue, he couldn’t fool himself entirely. “I could come and argue for you, I’ve done it before.”

“You mean mortally scar folks, Dad,” Red chuckled, piling bubbles onto Boss’ head playfully as he scrubbed at the squirming baby. “And I mean despite all this shi-zz, I still like the guy.” He shrugged, knowing Fell couldn’t see him. “It’s no skin off my bones the media’s nuts.”

“Hmm.” That didn’t sound good. “My son, the one who hissed at the thought of leaving his shop for a day when there was threat of a tornado, easily going along with someone’s half baked plan…for a vacation?”

Red winced. “Aw, Dad, don’t say it like-”

“There’s something wrong, isn’t there?”

Red groaned silently, sighing as he nudged a duck to Boss who squealed and swatted at it. “No, Dad, there’s not, I promise-”

“Too late, I’ve decided.” Red blinked, his face scrunching up.

“Uh, decided, what?”

“Never you mind, dear, let me talk to my grandson.” Red snorted, rolling his eyes but tapping the phone on speaker, sliding it up onto the sink so he could concentrate on cleaning Boss up. “Hellooooo, Bossy baby!”

“GWAN’PA!” Boss squealed, slapping the water and splashing eagerly. Red sputtered, laughing as Boss started chattering a storm to Fell, who made the appropriate approving noises. Boss adored him and Fell of course loved the both of them. Red hummed as he let out the water as Boss squeaked and babbled, whining when Red wrapped him up in a towel. “MAMA, NOOO, BAF!”

“Bath time’s over, silly.” Red picked up the phone, chuckling. “Here, say night night to Grandpa, kay?” Boss whined, hugging onto Red’s shirt with a pout.

“NI’ NI’, GWAN’PA…”

“Goodnight, love, be good for your mother,” Fell chuckled. “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye, Dad.”

With that they were off, Red snuggling Boss into his little sleepsuit, tucking him into bed. Boss hugged the little stuffed elephant Red had got him before he was born, nuzzling into the fur of the animal as Red quickly changed into his own pajamas. He plopped down into bed, tugging Boss close and kissing his head. “Night, baby.”

Boss yawned, clicking his teeth as he nuzzled up. “NI’ NI’, MAMA.”

———————

Red should have put two and two together, really. Considering this wouldn’t have been the first time his dad drove from wherever he had set up camp to go and help him out on the basis of ‘I felt you needed it’.

He felt vague amusement when he opened the shop door to the giant RV and his father, tall and foreboding with his arms crossed, nearly glaring down at Blue. “Dad, really?”

His dad looked over, still frowning, the glasses giving him a terrifying look. “What? I was merely-”

“Threatening him?” Red tutted. “Like you did with Michael in twelfth grade?”

Fell merely shrugged, his arms still crossed. He gave a foreboding look, his teeth as sharp as Red’s, two cracks slipping up one eye and down the other, wearing a long black cloak. Which he never did since he had retired but it was obvious it was to intimidate Blue.

Who looked intimidated at first, but upon noticing the sleeping toddler in Red’s arms, had perked up with a dopey happy look as he smiled at them. “REDDY~! AH, TOO EARLY FOR BABYBONES?” 

Red chuckled, shuffling Boss on his shoulder. “Yeah just a bit.” It was so early the sky was light blue, but no sun in sight just yet. Boss snored on, tucked under his baby blanket in Red’s arms. The only reason Red agreed to going so early was because if one more person tried to take their picture or reached out to touch, he’d slap a hand.

Or bite. One of two.

Red hid a yawn as Blue nodded quickly. “POOR DEAR! YES, LET’S, GET GONE THEN!”

“Get in then.” Fell motioned at the RV. Blue and Red stared at him in confusion.

“Uh. Dad?”

“What? You think I’ll allow you to go off by yourself?” He opened the driver’s door easily. “No need for the carseat, there’s a couch in the back, get in before anyone sees.”

Blue shrugged at Red with a smile and Red sighed, rolling his eyes. “Alright, let’s get in then, he won’t let up if we don’t.” Blue laughed, holding open the door to the RV for Red and Boss with a playful bow. Red snorted at him, hopping inside and shifting to lay Boss onto the couch, letting him lay his head in Red’s lap.

Blue nervously sat on the other side, blushing as he gave Red a nervous smile. Red rolled his eyes, shifting to lean back with a sigh, plunking his head against the window. “So. Tell me about your dad? And. Tirla, was it?”

Blue perked up, and he started to give Red a quick rundown of things.

His father, King Ding-sometimes called Dings-was the first and only son of the king before him and on and on. Blue was eldest so by law, he would inherit, however Ding had always told them both ‘if you’d ever decide otherwise, don’t ever feel regret for it, okay?’. His father was more modern than their predecessors. 

The land of Tirla was large, albeit not as prominent as England or the US. Tirla was famously known for their silk materials and for being a mostly pacifist land. The only war they participated in had been lengthy, but they powered through and survived without too much loss.

Now with the whole ‘media frenzy’ thing and internet, the people were more intrigued in the royal family than ever. Blue and Papy’s father, Ding, never quite got in with the whole social media. He had advisors to make those decisions. Blue and Papy however were happy to run their own profiles, albeit they had to be very very careful of what they approved and said.

The only ‘secret’ they had were the trips they took out of country. They first started as teens, going off to London to see the sights. They went to Germany, Canada, France, Spain, so on. They were very careful not to get caught, not out of fear or anything, but once their secret was out, they wouldn’t be left alone for a moment. 

And that’s what a holiday was, wasn’t it? To be left alone for a while and have fun. Papy was able to slip through people with ease, but Blue’s domineering personality quickly took hold of people’s attention. Surprisingly, this was the first time they were caught out and their holiday spot revealed.

Red frowned as the RV rolled to a stop at a stoplight, his hand cupped over Boss’ head comfortingly. “But how? I mean, that guy was the one ta find ya, right?”

Blue flushed, quickly nodding. “SI, HE WAS. I AM NOT CERTAIN MYSELF, BUT AH, I BELIEVE SOMEONE TOOK A PHOTO MY BROTHER TOOK AND DID…SOMETHING TO IT?” He made a motion in the air and Red nodded.

“Metadata, shows ya where it was taken and shit. That’s nice of them,” he muttered dryly. “Guess it’s nice they’re all supportin’ ya, huh?” he teased as Blue flushed brightly.

“Y-YES??”

Red snickered, laughing harder as Boss stretched out between them, digging his little heels into Blue’s side and making him grunt. The baby never did like to lay still for very long. The RV rumbled its way to the airport, albeit Fell had to adjust where he went as Blue quickly informed him it was a private plane off to the side. The men guarding the entrance only let them through when Blue pulled out some odd medal, and Fell huffed something under his breath, muttering.

Red had only packed a few things, changes of clothes for a month or so just in case, Boss’ clothes and his toys, an umbrella stroller…a book or two, some money just in case. He traveled light, of course.

Once they made it near the plane, a set of guards were stationed at the stairs leading up to it, and when the RV rolled to a stop, another set approached the door, opening it for them. Blue hopped out quickly, offering his arm for Red who had nearly toppled over after picking up one suitcase. He juggled for a moment, then set the suitcase down to get after he got out of the RV, holding a sleeping Boss on his shoulder as he took a step down.

The guard nearby immediately picked up all three suitcases, nodding sharply at them both before clicking his heels and stepping away. Red raised an eye ridge. “Convenient.”

“Yes, very much.”

Red and Blue jumped, looking up quickly. Fell also held onto a suitcase, adjusting his glasses as he stood near them. “Well? Are we leaving now or not? The last time I was on a plane I remember it rattling. Quite unnerving.”

Blue just blinked as Fell started rattling on about the event as he started walking ahead of the, easily avoiding one guard’s attempt to take his suitcase. Red shrugged at Blue nervously. “Um. Guess he’s coming?”

“WONDERFUL!” Blue chirped, smiling brightly. “I HAD WORRIED YOU WOULD BE LONESOME! I AM HAPPY HE’S VISITING AS WELL!”

Red did NOT melt at how enthusiastic Blue was and not frustrated with the sudden addition to their visitor list. No sirree bob. He certainly didn’t melt when they got on the plane and Blue happily showed Red a small little special toddler bed for Boss to sleep on instead of one of them having to hold him or keep him on an uncomfortable plane seat. No way. Not at all.

He…may have melted a little bit when Blue kissed his knuckles with a soft smile after, though. Maybe. Just a little. Tiny bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey if you can find the movie reference last chapter you get the opportunity to laugh under your breath as I did XD
> 
> eeehhhh what else. Oh! I just wanted to get this chapter out before working on the others for a bit! Haha. Uuummmm hmmmmm. Nothing else I can think of...eh it'll come to me.


	4. To Tirla!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ridin' on an airplane, an airplane, an airplane~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Red is totally the top in this story you can't tell me otherwise

Red didn’t mean to fall asleep. The small thrum of the engine, the quietness of the plane, the reassurance that his baby was sleeping deeply, all just slipped together into sending him off to dreamland while reading a book and cuddling in a blanket with Blue. He was pretty sure he drooled on Blue’s shoulder, but Blue didn’t mention it, just smiled at him and asked how he was.

Red yawned, shifting to rub at his face with a sigh. “ ‘M okay…how’s Boss?”

Blue peeked back, smiling. “SLEEP STILL! SHOULD HE WAKE UP SOON?”

Red sighed, nodding. “Yeah it’s nearly lunch, he needs ta eat or he’ll be cranky all day.” Blue nodded, helping Red up out of the seat with ease and folding their blanket back onto the seats. Red yawned again, humming as he reached under Boss, cooing at him as he slowly lifted him up. “Wakey wakey, time ta eat~”

Boss snored on, although his tiny arms wound around Red’s shoulders with a sigh. Red chuckled, shaking his head as he bounced him lightly. “Blue, can ya get some like, pasta or maybe some green beans? He likes those.” Blue saluted, quickly rushing off to go get the food. Idly, Red wondered where the fabled brother was, but assumed he had dozed off before meeting him. Ah well.

Boss fought waking up, whining and sniffling but Red calmed him down by kissing his hands and cooing at him. Fell appeared with an indulgent smile. “When you were that small, you hated being woken up too.”

Red snorted, shifting Boss on his hip as he squealed at Fell. “You tell me that all the time, Dad, heh.”

“GWAN’PA! I S’EP.”

Fell chuckled, reaching out and letting Boss hold his hand. “I saw. Hungry?”

Boss just giggled and Red snorted. “If he’s not, he can have some milk, although someone’s getting to be a big boy isn’t he~!” He cooed, bouncing Boss lightly. Boss was taking some initiative in weaning himself and eating more solid foods, but considering the…pretty rough time in between Boss being an infant and now, Red hadn’t exactly pushed him either. It was bonding time! That was his baby!

Boss giggled excitedly, nodding faster as he hugged Fell’s hand. A woman pushed a cart into the little lounge, and Blue pushed in a high chair with a flourish. Red chuckled. “Thanks, Blue.”

“MWEH! NOT A PROBLEM FOR THE WEE BABYBONES!” Boss stuck his tongue out with a giggle as Red settled him into it. Boss patted at the tray curiously, perking up when Red spread out some cheerios, pieces of carrots and a handful of corn. 

Red put down a little rubber spork. “Alrighty, gonna try and show off your eatin’ skills?”

Boss blinked, took the spork, then proceeded to stab at the cheerios with a gleeful squeal. Red sighed. “Yeah I should’ve seen that coming.” He perked up when Blue offered a plate of salisbury steak, taking a seat next to the toddler. Fell hummed, digging into his own steak as Blue settled next to Red with a bright grin. Red took a bite, humming. “Where’s your bro, anyway?”

Blue perked up. “FLYING!”

“…flying?” Red and Fell mumbled in response.

———————————————

Tirla’s airport was either immensely small, or this was meant for the royal family. Red was leaning towards the latter as a group of secret service looking guys came out, lining the walkway as he got the baby bag together. Boss was in a ‘I WALK!’ mood so he was busy tugging on Fell’s hand, giggling excitedly as Blue held Red’s suitcase with a happy look. 

A skeleton popped through the door connecting to the cockpit. He was tall, very tall, and the orange hoodie on him didn’t quite…match? In a way? A little like how Blue’s casual white shirt and shorts didn’t exactly match him. The tall skeleton waved. “Heya.”

“BROTHER! IT’S TIME TO GO!”

“I know, heh. Oh hey, baby bones,” He waved at the curious toddler before smiling at Red and Fell. “Name’s Stretch, nice to meet. Dad’s been nervous, callin’, let’s go.” He headed to the door first, opening it up and Fell nearly had to dive to stop Boss from bee-lining after him. The agents lined up stood straighter, somehow, as Stretch meandered out onto the rolled out carpet. Blue held Red’s hand gently down the stairs, checking on Fell and Boss as well so they wouldn’t fall.

Boss squeaked, pointing at one man. “HI HI!”

The agent gave a quick nod. “Buone cieazioni, giovane principe,” he murmured back, tapping something on his ear and Boss squealed, blabbering out his approximation of what the man said. Red flushed, shooing Boss on away.

“He’s a busy man, dear, come on now.”

Fell chuckled, following them easily. Once they were off the stairs they folded up, and the agents started to close in around them. Red laughed a bit nervously, squeezing Blue’s hand. “They’re uh, pretty close.”

Blue nodded. “PRECAUTIONS!”

Ah, yeah, that made sense. Still it felt…weird being walked in a circle. Stretch and Blue didn’t seem fazed, and Boss was happy to meet new friends. He squealed at them, and tried to talk, eventually Red had to heft him up since he still wasn’t quite the fastest little runner. A black sleek car met them in a garage and they piled in. A limo, yup, a limo.

The only time Red went in a limo was that one time for prom with some friends…they were pretty spacious. He cautiously let Boss down and he scrambled around, rolling and squealing happily before climbing up beside Stretch, clapping his hands on his face. “WHO YOU?”

Stretch grinned at him, an arm steadying the baby as they started off. “I’m the Ninja’s brother.”

Boss gasped, leaning in until their heads clanked. “NIN’AAAAA…” he whispered, sending Fell into a fit of laughter.

“Why does he think you’re a ninja??”

Blue shrugged, flushing nervously. “I AM UNSURE! IT IS QUITE CUTE.”

Red snorted. “I think it’s the scarf, Blue. There’s some show or another, a ninja has one.” Fell chuckled.

“Makes sense, I suppose.” Outside several black cars followed them, taking a small road here and there, other cars having to stop to allow them to pass by. Boss hopped down from his spot, clambering up on Red’s lap and plopping his face on his shoulder. Red smiled, rubbing his back softly.

“Gonna tucker yourself out before ya see anyone.”

“NUH-UUUUH,” Boss whined and Red tutted, rocking him sweetly.

“Mmm-hmmmm~” he cooed. Boss whined softly, and yawned, nuzzling into Red’s shirt to hide away. The ride there was quiet, since they couldn’t talk too loudly with Boss taking a nap. Red and Fell learned that they were headed to the castle, where the royal family still resided. They didn’t live exactly inside, there was a small ‘house’ in the middle of a courtyard that housed the royals as a precautionary measure from the late 1800’s. 

Neither of them were sure what from, just that they’d always had lived in there.

The castle itself was pure lovely and tall, with a curved driveway that the limo stopped at the doorway for. One of the agents appeared, and it took a few moments before he opened it, nodding. “Clear.”

Stretch ducked out first, holding out his arm to assist Blue with helping Red out the door, then helped Fell out. Fell chuckled. “Well thank you, young man.”

Stretch scratched his cheek, grinning. “Very welcome.”

Fell shook his head in amusement, and followed the others as they were cocooned in the circle of agents once more. The door opened, and they headed inside, Red shivering at the light cool air. “Oof, that’s nice, wish I brought a sweater,” he joked.

A maid swooped in, grabbing up some luggage with others, bowing at them before scuttling away. Boss stirred, squirming to be set down again so he could look around, his fingers pushed into his mouth as he blinked sleepily.

A man appeared through a nearby door with a giant grin, wearing a dark blue soft looking shirt, odd pants, cloth shoes and a thin robe unlike the very thick one Red had imagined. “Hallo! Hallo! Oh sons!” He clapped, hurrying over to the group and grabbing Stretch and Blue into a hug, kissing their cheeks. He let them go, still smiling brightly. “How odd! The newspapers, they said-”

“I KNOOOW…” Blue groaned as Stretch snickered. The king leaned a bit, blinking at their visitors. Fell raised an eye ridge, not impressed, while Red waved. Boss squeaked.

“YOU FUNNYYYYY!”

“B-Boss!” Red groaned as the King, Ding, laughed, waving a hand.

“Non non, babybones, they are so truthful!” He shooed his sons to the side, kneeling down to the toddler with a bright grin. “Hallo, little one, did you have fun time?”

Boss giggled, reaching up and patting at the man’s face with sticky fingers. “I S’EEP!”

Ding nodded gravely. “Sleep, very important.”

Red flushed, clearing his throat. “Sorry, he’s um, got you messy, heh. Ah. The newspapers kinda went weird, I guess.”

The king quickly stood, grinning as he clapped. “Non! Children, their mess is mere proof of their existence! Not to worry about papers, they, they are, eh, word,” He mumbled, waving a hand. “Non important. Yes. But ah, no grandbaby then?” He seemed disappointed and Red stifled a laugh as Fell snorted.

“Well they are flirting, so there might be hope yet.”

Red and Blue’s faces burned brightly as Ding laughed, nodding. “Hope, yes, what we need is hope! Ah, come come, I shall lead you around, show you things!”

He clapped again, quickly turning around with an energy to rival Blue’s. Red nudged Blue. “He acts like you, never stopping.”

Blue blushed, grinning as he gently took Red’s arm in his. “AH, MY FATHER IS VERY HAPPY AROUND CHILDREN. HE ADORES THEM.”

“Heh, how nice.”

The castle was huge, albeit Ding didn’t really take them everywhere. He showed them the dining room, the garden, stopped for a while so Boss could run around in the dirt and flowers. He showed them their rooms, and despite a bit of protest that they could find a hotel, he merely kept up the sparkling smile, telling them that he had suited up Red’s room with a bed for Boss, and how they had someone to wake them each morning they were here.

There was no arguing with him, not because he was rude or loud, he just gave an impression that you just…you couldn’t hurt his feelings????

For now, they had to go to bed, the change in time catching up to the three, and King Ding bowed his head several times, apologizing for making them walk all this time.

Red found it a bit funny. Fell just huffed and rolled his eyes, but Red could tell he was impressed, as well.

Blue paused by Red’s guest room as Boss rummaged in the bag for his pajamas. “MM, I SHALL, SEE YOU IN MORNING?”

Red nodded, hiding a yawn as he leaned against the doorway. “Yeah…um, thanks, for taking us here.”

Blue smiled. “IT IS OF NO PROBLEM, I ASSURE YOU!”

Red nodded, looking back at Boss who got distracted by his small dragon toy, then back at Blue and leaned up, pecking a kiss to his cheek before leaning back with a cheeky wink. “Night~”

He left a stunned Blue out in the hallway, intent on giving a now wound-up little toddler a bath and a cuddle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blue floats on clouds for the rest of the day~
> 
> what time is it? About 4 pm, but to them it's like...10 pm lmao
> 
> Anyway the next day will be some exploring, bonding of grandpas, and then...stuff =3


	5. A Pivotal Plot Point!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That one part of all Hallmark movies, you know the one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the one where you're like 'omg you met like a month ago and now you're kissing', it's totally that part

Tirla was a very beautiful place. For a moment, Red wondered why Blue and Papy always left for somewhere else, but then he recalled his own hometown and how he yearned to enter ‘the real world’ and face what was out there. Yeah, he understood that.

Of course, Boss wanted to go and see ‘ALL DE AMINALS!’ which Ding found highly adorable and he cooed at him in their language, clapping delightedly at the cute baby. He encouraged Red and Blue to go and explore…quietly, of course. King Ding’s team of PR folks were working on recovering things and making it so that Red wouldn’t be accosted about this in the future.

(At least until they got married, which Ding gushed about and Fell snorted to himself, leaving the two to blush and look away from one another.)

All the same, Blue managed to ‘sneak’ them out of the castle and to one of Tirla’s beautiful parks. It held a large fountain in the middle, several ducks and geese and swan toddling around, a few people mingling in the early morning. Blue was dressed in a very…eclectic set of clothes. He wore a baseball cap, large sunglasses, and a blindingly bright shirt with some gloves.

He looked like the 90’s threw up on him.

Red just went for his large coat and a simple scarf. Boss…well, he managed to hide him in the stroller. Boss disliked it when the sun shone on him, content to curl up in the shadow and doze until he got to see the animals. Red peeked over at Blue, who was busy smiling cheerily and looking up at the sun. “…so. This our first date?”

Blue sputtered, clutching the glasses to his face as he blushed bright. “A-AH, IT IS NOT, WELL, YOU SEE-”

Red laughed, nudging him playfully as they passed by a few kids playing in the fountain. “I’m teasing, Blue. Ain’t the best first date, huh?”

“I-IT IS NOT THAT!” Blue squeaked out. “IT IS LOVELY OUT, YES, A GOOD DATE, BUT YOU SEE!” He fidgeted with a button on his shirt. “THERE IS, AH, THERE IS…STEPS!”

“Steps,” Red repeated.

“STEPS!” Blue chirped back, stopping them near a small bench. “YOU SEE,” he started to ‘whisper’, “NORMALLY, IT GOES THAT, THE PARENTS, THEY SET THE WEDDINGS UP.”

Red nodded. “Arranged marriage, okay…”

“BUT AH, WHEN A PRINCE, OR PRINCIPESSA, DECIDES TO FIND THEIR OWN ENGAGEMENT, THERE ARE STEPS INVOLVED.”

Red snorted, leaning on the stroller with an amused grin. “Well, lay it on me then. Couldn’t hurt ta try, right?”

Blue seemed to be even more flustered at that, his hat spinning almost as he tried to gather himself. “W-WELL YOU SEE…THE FIRST AH, STEP IS TO AH…M-MEET EACH OTHERS PARENTS, AND HAVE THEM APPROVE.”

Red snickered. “That’s kinda over and done with, then. Next?”

Blue fiddled with his fingers. “TH-THEN A DINNER! YES, FINE DINNER, AH, AND TALKING.”

Red shrugged. “Sounds fine to me then.” He winked, pulling the hood on the stroller as Blue sputtered behind him. “Booossy babe, animal time~” Boss yawned sleepily as Red hefted him out, dressed in a simple overall as he plopped his head on Red’s shoulder. 

“MMM. MAMA…” he mumbled and Red rubbed his back, humming. 

“Wanna go chase a duck?”

He did, and, he did. The little boy was easy to hype up once cute and cool animals were involved. Blue seemed amused as he watched the little boy toddle after the slow ducks, squawking at them loudly. Red chuckled. “So, you really okay with it then?”

Blue nodded, nearly dropping the sunglasses. “YES! I-I MEAN, ONLY IF YOU ARE! UM, OKAY WITH IT.”

Red scoffed, poking at Blue’s leg with his foot. “I wouldn’t have let ya flirt with me the first time if I wasn’t.” Red winked. “Just ah, Boss is impressionable, so if things go sour…” He shrugged. “Well, it’s gotta be done…ya know, lightly.” 

Blue smiled, leaning in and wrapping his arm around Red sweetly. “FOR BOSS, YES, AND FOR YOU.”

Red flushed, swatting Blue with a huff. “What _about_ me, I’m fine.”

“YOU-”

“MAMA!” Boss squealed, rushing at them away from the honking goose. He nearly climbed up Red’s legs, making him laugh as he let Boss dangle in his arms, hissing back at the goose.

“Baby bones, what are you doing?”

Boss pointed at the goose. “TWIED TA NIBBLE! BAD! NAUGHTY NAUGHTY!”

The goose honked and he squealed, hiding against Red as it came closer. Blue laughed, picking up a small stick and shooing at the goose. “NOT TO WORRY, YES, THE GOOSE, LOUD TALKER. BAD FIGHTER. SHOO NOW.”

The goose honked again, but ambled away, feathers ruffled up now. Boss stared at him with wide eyes. “NIIIN’AAAA….” He whispered. Red snorted, kissing his head.

“That’s enough excitement for today, I think.” Boss whined, pouting sadly but perking up as Red continued, “How about a little ice cream then we go on back?”

“YEH!” Boss squealed and Blue nodded, digging out a small coin purse.

“HERE, YES, I SHALL-”

“NOOOO!” Boss whined, leaning out of Red’s arms and nearly bowling them both over, grabbing onto Blue with big eyes. “DA NIBBLE!”

Blue looked confused even as he had to scramble to take Boss from Red. Red chuckled. “He’s worried about the goose. Here, just, let me go get it.” Blue gave him the change, even as Boss pouted, and Red whistled as he ducked through the park to the ice cream stand near the entrance.

Fortunately, Boss was at the age he could eat a little bit now. Unfortunately…he failed to ask what kind Blue wanted. He cursed, mumbling to himself as he realized…he had no way to bring all three ice creams back. Ah well, that’s what they made elbows for.

He bought two chocolates and a vanilla one-everyone liked vanilla, right?-and as he turned, a car honked out near the parking lot. His head turned, staring, and it did it again. Someone’s alarm?

That split second was all they needed as someone violently smashed into him. The ice creams flew from his arms and he almost caught himself on the sidewalk, but someone pushed him again and he rolled, shouting and kicking before choking as someone dragged him by his neck into a dark vehicle. The door slammed shut but he couldn’t get them to let his neck go, no matter how he clawed at their hands and face.

“Go!” They yelled and the car took off, screeching out of the parking lot and nearly running over several people. Well, at least someone will know, Red thought aimlessly as he hissed and tried to bite the hand covering his mouth. The man cursed, backhanding Red hard enough to leave a bruise and he hissed, his head snapping to the side painfully. The man muttered something that sounded quite similar to a curse word Red knew, and he’d laugh but you know, the whole…air cutting off situation.

His vision was getting spotty, and his hands were barely able to grip on the man’s wrist as he wheezed…and then he heard something like a motorcycle zipping by?

He could feel himself passing out, jerked back into reality as the man up front yelled in Blue’s language and jerked the wheel, causing the man to loosen his grip and Red gasped. The man yelled, “Vhat are you-!”

“Zis lambucha-” the man up front started to say until there was a horrendous screech and a _bam_ , the vechicle lurching forward and causing Red and the man to sprawl out on the floor. Red shook away the spots in his vision then punch the man hard in his nose, making him howl.

“Who the hell do you think you are?!” he snarled, nearly pouncing on the man and battering his face, the man trying the same thing Red had attempted a moment ago, scratching at his hands to make him stop, but Red was a dirty fighter and bit the man’s fingers once they came into close enough position.

Several bright lights that echoed Police across all language barriers were flickering around them but Red didn’t care, this guy nearly killed him! And for what!

Ice cream?!

No wait that sounded ridiculous.

Whatever it was, it wasn’t worth killing Red over! Or at least, Red thought so, definitely. When the door that wasn’t smashed in opened, Red had blood on his hand and his teeth dug into the cursing man’s hand.

Blue’s voice echoed some foreign word and Red looked up, letting go of the man’s hand who hissed and yanked it down, hiding it as he tried to squirm away from Red. “Oh, hey Blue. Where’s the baby?”

Blue had a motorcycle helmet on but Red could tell it was him-which, Blue had a motorcycle? Red kind of wondered if he would let him ride-and Blue nodded to the side, a police officer holding the crying toddler.

Red smacked the man’s head and made him grunt, climbing out of the car and taking Blue’s offered hand. “Thanks. Er. You got a-yeah that’s it,” Blue held out a towel and Red went to take it, but Blue gently took his hand, wiping it softly with the towel to get rid of the gore. The helmet visor flipped up and Blue’s worried face stared at him.

“YOU ARE OKAY? YES? NOT HURT?”

Red snorted, fidgeting his face away from Blue’s tenacious wiping. “I’m fine. Well, now, at least. What happened?”

It turned out that while the country was happy for the royal family to expand, some were more happy for...other reasons. A kidnapping wouldn’t have been unforeseen but the guards-that is, the ones who followed Blue and Stretch from afar-had only been keeping a tight eye on Blue himself. Once Red left their vision, they lost him.

Thank goodness he hadn’t brought Boss with him. The two men would’ve been killed for that one. Red wasn’t one who didn’t know how to defend himself, he knew some self defense, at least. But you don’t mess with someone’s baby.

Red kept hissing at Blue that the blood wasn’t his as Blue tried to clean him off, giving him big puppy eyes as they headed to the gaggle of officers. Some were already handing over the would-be kidnappers to the Guards, while another quickly handed over the very upset toddler. “MAMAAAA!” he squealed, kicking the poor man in the arm as he squirmed to get into Red’s arms.

Red tutted, taking him easily from the slightly distraught police man, bouncing Boss on his hip as Boss sobbed into his shoulder. “Shh, there there, my brave baby,” he mumbled, kissing his head as he sighed. “Guess that ruins that outing. What?” he asked as Blue kept looking at him.

Blue blushed, averting his eyes as he cleared his throat. “YOU ARE! JUST, VERY, BRAVE! YES,” he laughed nervously, nodding. Red snorted.

“Uh huh. We should probably head back.”

Blue nodded quickly, quickly chattering out orders as he wrapped an arm around Red’s shoulders. Boss whined and pushed at the arm, pushing his head into Red’s neck to hide and Red sighed softly. There was no way Boss was letting him out of sight now…

——————————————

“What?” Red groused, opening an eye socket.

Coming back to the castle was an experience. Both of their dads were highly concerned, along with Blue’s brother of course, who had stuck at home to get used to the time change again. Boss was NOT appeased with any attempt at a ‘nap’ or anything that meant Red putting him down, which Red wasn’t really up to doing anyway. Instead, he managed to get them both dressed in comfier clothes and just plopped them on the large, plush couch in front of the fireplace.

Blue joined them, Boss sound asleep (with a few hiccups here and there, easily soothed by a hand rubbing his back) and Red pretending to be with one leg dangling off the couch, the other resting against the back of the couch.

Blue had been just…watching him, had been the time they’d been home. He blushed, having been caught, clearing his throat. “YOU…”

Red waited, fingers tapping a rhythm on the sleeping toddler’s back. “I…?”

“YOU WERE…MM…” Blue hesitated, blushing brighter. Red would’ve found it amusing if he wasn’t so exhausted and a little irritated.

“Just fucking say it already, what is it-”

“YOU WERE BREATHTAKING!” Blue squeaked out, blushing bright. Red blinked as Blue started stuttering, “V-VERY TOUGH AND YOU, YOU FOUGHT VERY GOOD, YES, AND!” he started babbling out in his language-honestly, Red needed to learn it if only for the curse words-and Red chuckled, shifting to sit up slowly so as to keep Boss cradled close.

“Blue.”

Blue looked at him with a squeak. “Y-YES?”

“Shut up.”

Then he kissed him, for a moment, in the flickering flames of the fireplace (until a small elbow nudged Blue away with a sharp whine, leaving them both slightly flushed and giggling like teens).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Boss. I kinda. Scarred him a little. Babies, man.
> 
> Aaaanyway. Boss just wants his mama, he still likes Blue but yeah


	6. Blooming Glitter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A dinner is had and then...mawwiage is what bwings us together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hit a brick wall with this but honestly this is prime Hallmark material, I'll have my agents call your agents ;)

After the events of the day before, the palace was basically locked down. No one was allowed in, except those whose appointments had already been made in advance or who the King knew.

Which meant that the two families now had...plenty of time to bond and get to know each other.

Ding was really happy to spend time with Boss, and Fell was happy to show off many, many photos of the baby and his own son of course. Red had let them spirit the toddler away so he and Blue could have lunch (albeit reluctantly, because hey it’s his baby, after all).

Fell sat on the floor, criss crossing his legs, as Boss toddled around the room, curiously holding onto the couch and staring at Ding as he scooted his way around. Ding smiled at him. “Very curious little baby, yes? Hm?” He held out his hand and Boss made a face, slapping it then squealing and slapping at it again fiercely.

Fell snorted. “Should’ve warned you, he likes to ‘high five’ people.”

Ding smiled. “I do not mind, he is quite energetic!”

“Yes,” Fell agreed, “You’d be surprised but he’s much like his mother at that age. Red was a tornado on legs until he got older.”

Ding laughed, curling his fingers so Boss could onto his hand, as he started wiggling the fingers curiously. “The true test of time, how we oft slow and still.”

Fell shrugged. “I suppose. Ah, this one is his cute bear towel.” He tilted his phone to show the small baby Boss after a bath, wrapped in the towel in Red’s arms. Ding cooed over it as Boss squealed, hands flexing at the phone.

“I WANNA PWAY?”

Ding smiled in confusion as Fell tutted, putting his phone away. “No no, your mother doesn’t like you playing on the phone. Here.” He pulled out a book from the diaper bag as Boss pouted, but squealed when Ding hefted him onto the couch.

“Reading is very important!” he stated, nodding and taking the book that read along to them. “Yes, mightily so for adults, helps one ah, communicate to others!”

Boss blinked, then stuck out his tongue and patted the book, giggling as he opened it up. He hit the green puppet’s button, and it yelled ‘I AIN’T GROUCHY!’ and he squealed, kicking his feet with a laugh. Fell gave a rough sigh. 

“Well, he’ll be distracted an hour.”

Ding chuckled, playfully jiggling Boss’ little foot and he squeaked, staring at him with wide eyes. “I recall a music box my grandmother gave me. I would ask to wind it over and over every night, oh yes. It was so darling!”

“DAHLIN!” Boss chirped, then squirmed to kick his legs into Ding’s lap, tongue peeking out as he started to ‘read’ to them...albeit it was loud random words.

Fell took a sneaky picture.

\------------------------

 _Screeech….Screeech...clunk_.

Red sat down heavily in the ornate chair with a sigh, Blue now next to him with a flush. “See? ‘S fucking stupid me all the way down there.” He waved at the other end of the table. The very long, very, very long table that was barely filled with food since it was _just the two of them_.

Blue laughed nervously, nodding. “I-I SUPPOSE, YES?”

Red snorted, shifting to sit up easier. “Could you hear me all the way down there? No, of course not. Besides this is more uh, intimate? I guess?” Blue blushed darker at that and Red snickered, leaning in and playfully pressing a kiss to his cheek. “You’re fun ta rile up. Now eat.”

“Y-YES’M!” he squeaked, quickly digging into...the soup? Kind of? It was soup-ish with little funny balls of dough bobbing around. Red shrugged. Not the weirdest thing he’s eaten, by far. 

So now instead of awkward silence sitting about a highway away, they now had...awkward silence sitting shoulder to shoulder. Wonderful.

Playfully, Red nudged Blue’s foot to get his attention. Blue looked up curiously. “So eh, let’s talk, right?”

“S-SURE, YES!”

…

“Hmm…” Red groaned, pulling apart a bun to nibble on. “Small talk sucks. Tell me about stuff ya like to do.”

Blue launched into a very long explanation about horse racing, his eye lights stars as he gushed about his own horse, Guinevere, and how beautiful her coat was. Red chuckled. “I’ll watch ya race.”

“TRULY? MM, I AM NOT SO GOOD, YES, BUT I LOVE TO RACE!” Blue squeaked, his cheeks bright blue.

Red smiled, tilting his head. “Yeah, sounds fun. Maybe even take Bossy out on a ride, I think he’d like horses.” 

Blue gasped, nodding quickly. “HE WOULD BE GREAT HORSE RACER! I CAN TELL.”

Red snorted a laugh, snickering as Blue puffed up. Heh. Cute.

Red took another bite of the roll. “You gonna take Bossy around later?” The media had requested an interview with the King in order to understand what had happened, and to meet Red (which they didn’t say but he assumed). However, he didn’t want Boss around all that, mostly he didn’t want his kid’s face plastered around everywhere, but he also didn’t think it fair for them to jam microphones in his face and ask questions he couldn’t even understand.

So, Blue was going to take Boss around the little garden and distract him as best he could. He’d offered, and Red would take him up on it. Blue nodded, sipping his glass of water. “MWEH, OF COURSE! THERE ARE MANY BEAUTIFUL BUTTERFLIES FOR HIM TO CHASE!

Red chuckled. “He does love animals. Alright, if he gets hungry there’s some animal crackers in his bag, don’t feed him yet.” Red pointed his fork at Blue with a serious face. “Dinner’s at 5, and he needs to be able to eat by then.”

Blue quickly nodded, not at all frightened by the fork pointing at him. “OF COURSE!”

Red poked him with a fork, sticking his tongue out. “Yeah yeah. Ya goose.”

A lunch well ate, and a date well had. (In Blue’s view, anyway. Red thought it a little boring, and idly wondered what riding a horse would be like with Blue.)

——————————

Blue held Boss’ hands, leading him around the paved rocks and through the shrubbery. “AND THIS, YOU SEE, IRIS!” Blue leaned them close to a gorgeous flower that swayed in the wind. Boss blinked, cooing as he reached up, touching it.

“I WISS!” 

Blue laughed. “CLOSE, YES, VERY CLOSE! AND THIS!” He lead them down to another bush with a pretty blue flower on top. “THIS IS YARWA, AH, APOLOGIES, I DON’T KNOW THE NAME ANY OTHER WAY.”

“YAAAWWWW,” Boss mimicked, opening his mouth wide and giggling as the ‘ninja’ led them away. The reporters were at the front, snapping photos and lobbing questions at his father and Red. Red unfortunately couldn’t understand half of them, so he merely hovered in the back, while Ding diplomatically answered their questions with a gentle smile.

Boss wasn’t so happy to be kept away from his mother, but he was thrilled to be led around the little garden with Blue. He pointed at one near the entrance. “WHAT DAT?”

Blue perked up, happily holding Boss’ hand and leading him over. The flower was a simple little pink bud amongst many, but this one seemed to glitter in the sun as it blossomed, coated in an odd sheen with a spray of yellow in the inside. “AH, THIS IS IMPORTANT, LITTLE ONE!” He held one of Boss’ hands as he leaned over, cupping the little flower softly. “THIS FLOWER BLOOMS AFTER A RAIN, YES. AND THERE IS A TRADITION, THAT ONE MUST GIVE A BLOOMING GLITTER TO THE ONE THEY WISH TO MARRY.”

Boss wiggled his nose in confusion. “MAWWY?”

Blue nodded, smiling at him. “YES! AH, YOU SEE, WHEN SOMEONE IS IN LOVE, S-SOMETIMES,” he blushed, thinking of Red, “SOMETIMES THEY WISH TO AH…LIVE…TOGETHER…AND HAVE B-BABIES?”

Wait was that right to say?

Boss seemed to accept it, nodding with a thoughtful look. “NIN’A BABIES?”

“HUH?”

Blue’s dream bubble was popped as Boss reached up to grasp at the blooming glitter, but before he could stop him, the little hand grabbed it with a squeal, puttering away as fast as his toddler legs could carry him. “AH, WAIT, NO, BABYBONES! PLEASE, COME BACK!” It wasn’t a horrible thing for the baby to have the flower-unless he ate it-but Red would tear him apart should Boss disappear into the castle without anyone to watch him! Besides, there were so many flowers to bloom on the bush, and the tradition was merely…decorative in a way. An old fashioned thing that was now just purely romantic instead of a rule.

The toddler panted as he wheeled out of the garden, nearly tripping a few times on his pants before he trotted away. Blue tripped on a tree trunk but caught himself, taking off again and silently groaning. The little boy squeezed between a reporter’s legs, several of them cooing at him although it seemed Boss was on a mission.

Blue would’ve torn his hair out had he had any. Instead he booked it for the front of the crowd, knowing that Boss was aiming for Red. Red watched on in amusement, kneeling down to catch a panting Boss as Blue appeared, hefting him up on his hip. “I AM SO SORRY, RED! HE JUST YANKED AWAY AND-”

“Aw it’s okay, I know how toddlers can be-”

“MAMA, HERE!”

A flower was shoved in Red’s face and he had to yank back quickly, sputtering before laughing. He cupped his hand over the flower, not noticing how the reporters had quickly targeted onto the small group now. “Oh what’s this?” He hummed, taking it from the little hands, the flower now squished and losing its shininess. 

Boss giggled and pointed at Blue with a mischievous grin. Blue laughed nervously. “A-AH, TIS BE A FLOWER FROM THE GARDEN, YES, HE WAS VERY EAGER FOR…SOME…REASON TO GIVE TO YOU…”

Red chuckled, kissing the pointing hand. “Oh is this a present then? Hmmm? Thank you, I accept it.”

With that a gasp rang out in the crowd, and several of them started taking pictures, rapidly asking questions in their language again. Ding seemed to be ecstatic as well, albeit he tried to control the crowd while Red gave Blue a questioning look.

Boss clapped his hands, hugging Red. “YAY, BABIES! I WANNA HUG ‘EM!”

“….what?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a friend whose little one (he's about 5?) who just. is adored with babies. Like he has a baby doll that he treats better than anything. So all I can imagine is Boss going ninja-ninja babies-babies-can hug
> 
> so obv Ninja has to have babies so that Boss can play with them and OBVIOUSLY this means Mama has to be involved (or maybe he was just letting Red know lmao)
> 
> yaaaay impromptu proposal \o/


	7. When Fate Comes A-Knockin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A person from Red's past comes to light, but is he who he says he is?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is taking a sharp left turn into weird territory but let's be real, if Hallmark movies ever check out the side quests of their own main missions, they'd uncover some radical things.

_Red stirred to knocking at his door. He stared aimlessly at the wall a moment, as if waiting for his mind to kick in and he sighed, slinging his legs over the edge of the couch as he adjusted his robe over him. He’d just gotten his newborn to nap, and whoever it was better have a decent explanation for waking him from a well-deserved nap._

_He flung his door open, scowl on his face, slowly easing as he saw an officer standing at his door. He crossed his arms. “Um. Hello?”_

_The officer cleared his throat, nodding. “Ma’am. I’ve got some unfortunate news. May I come in?”_

_Red rolled his eyes, although his soul started to thrum. If he acted like it was nothing, if it was something annoying to him, maybe the universe would find it fitting to give him something boring like someone calling in about their car’s tire making that stars-damned racket last night. “Sure, whatever.”_

_He let the door open, shooing the officer in. “My kid’s asleep so if you could just be a little quiet,” he grumbled, and the officer nodded, taking his hat off as he sat on the couch._

_“ ‘Course.”_

_Red shuffled by him, coming back with a cup of coffee, nervously taking a seat as he bounced a leg, handing the cup to the officer who took it without a word. “So…what’s this about?”_

_“Well...what was your husband doing earlier?”_

_Red tilted his head, thinking for a moment, sleep still dragging at the edges of his memory. “Well, um, well. We got up, I fed the baby, he made breakfast…” He hesitated, plucking at the edge of his robe. “Oh he was supposed to go and get groceries! Ya know, first time parents, didn’t really count on uh, how fast time passed,” he chuckled, and the officer cracked a smile but didn’t laugh._

_“I see.” He set the cup down, after taking one sip, and Red watched him nervously, hands curling into the tie of his robe now. “We found his truck idling in a ditch, upright. We looked through it, found his phone, no backpack or anything but...we can’t find him, it seems.”_

_Red blinked, frowning. “...no he was supposed to be back in…” His eye lights flicked to the clock on the wall, a gift from his father despite the fact that he didn’t approve of his husband. It was an owl clock, and every hour on the hour it made a noise from a specific bird._

_Cheerfully, Red had noted at the time, it was on the pretty red bird that stood for 3, Boss loved it or so it seemed based on how his little eye lights tracked the clock when they would walk by._

_Now, however, the hand was on the master owl himself, standing as a 6. He knew an hour had passed earlier but...did Richard really leave for three hours? Not even on their busiest day did it take that long in the store._

_Red gulped, looking away as he pulled out his phone, staring at it. The last text he’d gotten, and responded to, was ‘what kinda cheerios? There’s 8 million now babe’_

_‘Honey ;P’_

_And it wasn’t even read._

_Red looked up, frowning. “...I...I don’t…” He started to breathe faster, his hand shaking as the officer leaned over, cupping his hand around Red’s._

_“We’re trying to figure this out now, ma’am, we just need a list of all the places you would think he would go to,” he spoke kindly, which somehow made things all the more worse. “If we could, could we look into his computer? Maybe he left something there or-”_

_“Y-Yeah, whatever, just. I need to. I.”_

_Red stumbled off the couch, the officer watching him leave with a sad look on his face._

_Red locked the bathroom behind him as the panic attack hit full force, wheezing as he sunk down onto his knees. The plush carpet pressed into his bare knees, his hands shaking as he held his phone tightly._

_This was the bathroom where they picked out the funny Halloween shower curtain together. Where Richard boasted on how he had his own private toilet (while Red just gave him a curious look and a roll of the eyes). Where their baby took his first bath with them, cradled on Red while Richard cooed and sang to the baby as he gently took a cotton swab to clean between the crevices as Red had taught him to do with baby bones._

_Never again. Never would he hear that rumbling voice, or hear his yawns, or feel the warm hand on his head as he passed by with a ‘ ‘scuse me, sugah’._

_The phone dialed, rang twice, and, “Red?”_

_“D-Daaaad!” Red wailed, starting the worst set of events to come._

Red stirred awake in the plus bed of their room, sucking in a slow breath. His face was wet, and despite how the dream started to fade-well, memory-he knew what it was about. He shook his head slowly, taking an edge of the blanket and wiping his face clean quickly. Boss snoozed on, his little head tucked up close to Red, hand holding onto his shirt.

Red dragged them up slowly, tucking Boss in with a ‘shhh’ as the toddler shifted, yawning and clicking his mouth together. He had on his spiderman pajamas, which made Red smile. He loved his heroes…

A week had passed since the whole ‘Flower Incident’ as Red jokingly dubbed it. Blue kept apologizing while Stretch and Ding kept gushing about the wedding (although Red felt it was more of a poke at Blue from Stretch. Brothers, right?).

Fell gave Red a look, probably wondering why he was going along with it.

If Red was honest…

...he wasn’t sure why. He knew that it was pretty important, a wedding meant staying together forever...and while he didn’t exactly feel some all-encompassing love for Blue (yet), he did like the guy enough that he nudged him into a movie date. 

(They held hands all during it, Blue blushing so bright it shone, while Red ate his weight in popcorn.)

But you know what? Red wanted to feel a little selfish. He was lonely and Blue was a nice guy who made him smile and maybe it was a weird roundabout way of doing things, but honestly?

He wasn’t against marrying the guy.

He didn’t seem to have a bad bone in his body. Boss loved him, which sealed the deal for Red.

And he would do pretty much everything for his baby.

And maybe this was half for his baby and half for him. 

Red just...wanted someone who didn’t take one look at his kid and bowed out of his life. Not that he dated much before Blue, really, but when he did it was either ‘oh...you have a kid...listen-’ or ‘that’s kind of hot’. Then he’d feel all sorts of weird on the date. Ew.

Blue was...well he just was awesome. Not because of being a prince but just how sweet and kind he was.

And he definitely didn’t seem to argue against the wedding.

So, you know, Red didn’t have any feelings to wrestle through, like his dad was thinking. This was the best thing for him and his baby, and he...wanted this, in a small selfish way.

Just once, he’d like something to go right.

\-----------

A man had been let into the castle, stating he had something important to speak to the King about. He was tall, had dark brown hair, wouldn’t look out of place chopping logs honestly, and had a backpack on his back. He had a cut on his chin, possibly from a razor, and the way his head kept twisting back and forth to look around meant he hadn’t been in a place so luxurious as this.

The King greeted him with a smile, as usual. “How may I help you? Yes? You said you wanted to ah, talk something? About Red?”

The man smiled, nodding. “Yeah, I’ve got something a little important to say to him.”

\----------

The first thing Fell did was punch him, to Red’s shocked ‘Dad!’. Stretch had taken Boss to a playroom while they talked. Fell shrugged, cracking his knuckles. “He deserved it.”

Red shook his head, staring incredulously at the man now cradling his jaw. “Richard, what the hell?!”

The man gave a jovial smile, ruined by the now bloom of red on his cheek. “Man have I got a story for you-”

“I’m not sure I wanna hear it,” Red crossed his arms, looking away. He didn’t want to show that he was quickly losing the battle on tearing up. “You just up and vanish for two years and think you can come waltzing back? Nah.”

The man pouted, whining as he slid the backpack off his back. “But Red, I’m really sorry! Something happened, I swear, and I’ll tell you all about it!”

Red scoffed, not looking his way as Blue put a hand on Red’s shoulder, giving a shaky smile. “WELL, PERHAPS IT IS BEST TO START FROM BEGINNING, YES? ALTHOUGH, DID TAKE VERY LONG TO FIND RED, SO…”

The man shot him a look, which Red didn’t see, but started up the tale.

The day he went missing, a man had dragged him out of his truck. He was blindfolded and taken far away, and then...he woke up on his family’s compound.

Red knew about Richard’s family. He hated them, split from them the moment he turned 18 and ducked out far away from them. He didn’t say everything that they had done, but that it was enough to consider them ‘awful people’. It was odd, yet a little funny, in seeing how he reacted to things he didn’t know about. The guy barely knew what an internet was, and while being treated like fragile glass was both annoying yet touching, it was...scary how he’d immediately jump into an ‘I can do it!’ mentality when Red had to clean or cook or something.

He was a great father, but he was...well, it’s rude to speak of the dead, but Red caught him sometimes, staring at the baby with a wide-eyed stare.

Almost like he was frightened of him…

Either way, the tale that Richard spun wasn’t too out there, knowing his family, he supposed. Red sighed, rolling his eyes at the end of it, still leaning against the couch away from him. “...well. I guess it sounds right,” he grumbled.

Richard perked up from the armchair, smiling. “Can I please see our baby? I’ve missed him so much. I bet he’s so big now!”

Red let out a short laugh, shaking his head as he uncrossed his arms. “...yeah okay, fine, ya goof.”

Blue nervously looked over at Fell, who scowled. They both felt like there was something more to this than what was going on…

\------------

“IT IS JUST,” Blue continued, slowly rolling his fingers over Red’s, bending Red’s fingers this way and that in a massage as they watched from afar how Richard smiled and nodded to Boss throwing his toys at him to ‘introduce’ them all. “VERY WEIRD, YES? VERY...OUT THERE?”

Red frowned, looking over at Blue, not stopping him. Hey the massage felt pretty nice. “Well...I dunno, Blue. I wanna think it’s all good, ya know? I did...miss him.” Red winced, looking down. That was a sticking point between them, wasn’t it? What were they now that Richard had appeared back in Red’s life?

Blue gently pressed a kiss to his fingers, smiling dazzlingly at Red. “I UNDERSTAND! HE STOLE YOUR SOUL FIRST, IS TRUE. HOWEVER, I WOULD...FEEL BETTER ABOUT...LETTING YOU GO ONCE AH...ONCE THINGS ARE SETTLED?”

Red snorted, rolling his eyes, ignoring the blush on his face. “Letting me go, huh? Like ya already had me?” he teased, squeezing Blue’s hand. “...so, what, you’re suspicious of him?”

Blue gave a one-sided shrug. “IS JUST VERY ODD. I JUST…” He paused, giving a softer smile now. “EVEN IF OUR FATES NOT ALIGN, I STILL CARE FOR YOU.”

Red sighed, leaning up and pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek, leaning back. “You’re a wonderful guy, Blue. ...thanks.”

Neither of them noticed Richard’s glare from the side, hot gaze on the softly whispering couple, attention taken by the toddler when he dragged another toy over and faking a smile.

“Man these are neat toys, kiddo,” he whispered, making Boss giggle as he leaned down a bit, as if checking out the toy in the toddler’s arms. “You know who would really love to see these?”

“WHOOOO?” Boss squealed, bouncing on his heels.

Richard smiled widely. “Your grandparents!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *someone nudges you in the dark movie theater as the movie starts to play. Popcorn is rattled. You take a handful.  
> *"Man," you say, "I can't wait to see what's next."  
> *"Me either," says the director, feet propped up on a seat as she too munches on the popcorn.


	8. Arguments Are Had

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red and Richard are starting to feel the strains of being apart for so long. People change over the years, right? That's all it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Red is totally of the mind of not fighting in front of the kids if you can help it, but he will willingly throw himself into a fray to defend his bby.

The first time Richard brings it up, Red doesn't think much of it. He's folding a few of Boss' clothes from the dryer-that the maid brought even though he said he didn't mind washing them-when arms wrap around him, startling him. He tilted his head back with a sly smile. “What are you doing?”

“What?” Richard grinned back, his head slotting on Red's shoulder like he used to. “Can't I hug my own wife?”

Red held back a wince, feeling a bit awkward now as he continued to fold one of Boss' pajama suits. “Mm. I guess. But you want something, I know how you are.” Knew. Er. Know? Hm.

Richard hummed, nuzzling their cheeks together. “Why don't we go home? Spend time together, maybe start figuring out some things?”

“What's the rush?” Red said, patting the folded pajama suit, pushing it in the basket with a huff. “Ain't like we'll have another opportunity ta visit.”

Richard sighed, unwinding his arms from Red to let him drag the basket to the side so Boss could pick what he'd like to wear later. “I just miss our home is all...and spending alone time with you.”

Red shot him a confused look, hands on his hips. “We can spend time here. What's wrong with that?”

Richard gave up, changing the subject, and Red thought that was the end of it. After all, the King (while disappointed in the obvious non-marriage now) had offered to board them so long as they wanted to stay. Red had already told Richard he had closed his store for a while, and wanted to explore more of Tirla.

He didn't seem all too interested in that.

Which was odd. Richard loved exploring and 'new adventure's. It was Red who usually pleaded to stay home after a weekend of hiking. Hm.

~~

The second time, he had dragged Boss into it.

The toddler was excited at going home (while also happily staying here), but Richard had said or did something enough that Boss had started up one of his world-famous screaming fits when Red asked them why they were so adamant on going home.

Red glared at Richard as Boss stomped his feet, laying on the carpet as he crossed his arms. “The frick, Rich?”

“What?” He didn't seem apologetic, he even had let Boss slip from his arms in order to throwdown. Red rubbed a temple as Boss shrieked, startling a maid into rushing away. (He had no tears, so Red knew it was just a fit and not him being tired or anything.)

“You got him all revved up, you know you can't just do that to a kid!”

Richard shrugged. “Sorry. The screaming's giving me a headache.”

And then he just fucking left Red in the middle of the hall with their screaming toddler.

Red let out a long sigh, making a mental note to argue with him about it later, as he plopped down besides Boss who started to whine and kick his leg. “Boss, kick the floor, not me.”

Boss huffed, slapping the carpet angrily and just screeching now. Stretch of all people peeked around the corner, eyes wide. “...everything...okay?”

Red shook his head, face heating up now that someone was around. “Boss is worked up, once he's done we'll go for a nap.”

“NOOOOO NAAAAP!” Boss squealed, then started rolling around on the carpet. Stretch blinked.

“Is...that okay for him?”

Red snorted. “It's good ta scream it out once in a while. So long as he ain't banging his head or sobbing, I let him get it out of his system.”

Stretch nodded, watching the toddler angrily squirming around, still screeching. And then, like magic, he stopped, panting on the ground, his little shirt-and-pants combo now wrinkled beyond belief, his shoes sparkling up a disaster now that his stomps had stopped. Red looked over, head on his hand, and he reached over, holding out his hand.

Boss sniffled, rolling over and slapping his hand into Red's, grunting as he pulled himself up. “I SOWWY, MAMA...”

“I know you are, baby,” Red kissed his forehead, smiling. “Feel better.”

Boss nodded, frowning. “UHN.”

“Wanna nap with Mister Whale?”

“NO,” he sniffed, but held up his arms for Red to scoop him up anyway. Stretch tilted his head.

“I do not recall us having...a...fit? At that age.”

Red snickered, bolstering Boss on his hip, the toddler poking and prodding at Red's cheek as if making sure his mama had picked him up. “Ya wouldn't remember it, ya goof. You'd be too young.” He sighed. “Nah he inherited his temper from me, Dad said I could scream down a barn.”

Stretch bobbed his head. “I believe that.”

Red thwacked him on the side, gently kissing Boss' head and assuring him he was not mad at all for Boss expressing his being upset at not getting his way. Boss would eventually grow out of his temper, or rather, he would be able to control it and decipher his emotions better than let him become a screaming, thrashing toddler on the ground.

He took Boss to the room, tucked him in to bed with his whale toy, and reassured him that he wasn't mad at the toddler. Boss squirmed under his blankets, eyes wide as he sucked on his thumb. Red frowned, gently stroking his tiny head. “Do you really wanna leave so fast, dear? We haven't been here that long.”

Boss shook his head, giggling at the touches to his head. Red's frown increased. “So what was all that about, young man?”

Boss squirmed, his thumb popping out of his mouth. “DADA SAY, SUWPWISE! I WANT IT.”

Surprise? Red nodded, smiling as he tucked Boss in. “Maybe, okay? For now, you take a nap and Mama and Dada will...talk about the surprise.”

“OTAY!” Boss hoped it was a kitten like he'd seen in the gardens. It wasn't too long after Red turned on the night light that he was drifting off, and Red spirited out of the room, ready to rage on his (ex)husband.

~~

“Well fuck me for trying to get our kid excited about something!”

“What the hell's gotten into you?!” Red screamed back, both of them angrily standing each other down. Even as short as he was, Red appeared like he could rip Richard's throat out with ease. “Gettin' him riled up and leaving us alone like that!”

They continued to squabble, loudly, and Blue sat on the couch nervously, staring at the platter of cookies he had appeared with in order to have a snack with the toddler and Red...and maybe Richard if he was around.

But here they were, in a screaming match about some slight that Blue wasn't sure about, but he didn't think they should be screaming so loud about it.

Red's dad had appeared, but even though he didn't like Richard right now, even he seemed uneasy with the fight happening. Eventually it started to wind down, Red growling at him, “I think we should calm down for a bit,” he sighed, hand sliding down his face.

Richard nodded, taking a step forward. “Yeah, I-”

“No, fuck what you want,” Red bit out, turning to grab a cookie. He angrily pointed it at his husband. “You stay away from our room and sleep fuck all elsewhere until I feel like sharing a bed.” He bit into the cookie, glaring at Richard, then shifted his look to Blue, who straightened up quickly under the intense look. “Good cookies, Blue,” he mumbled, shuffling out of the room.

Richard sighed, ruffling a hand through his hair. “Well fuck.”

Blue laughed nervously. “A-AH. YES. WELL. COOKIE?”

Richard made a face, turning and stepping out of the room, stomping as he went. Blue sighed, looking up at Fell. “FIGHTING, IS ODD, YES?”

“Between them or in general?” Fell huffed. “As much as I loathed the man, I'd heard nothing but sweet gushy things between them. I don't think I've ever seen them fight, or heard of it.”

Blue nodded, standing up with a sigh. “LET THEM COOL OFF THEN? AH, PERHAPS, CHECK IN ON RED AFTER A BIT...” he mumbled. Fell nodded.

“He'll be upset, and Boss won't understand why he's upset and it'll make HIM upset, and so on and so forth.” He shook his head. “Such a strange argument, that one.” He reached down, taking a cookie as Blue frowned.

“HM? WHY?”

“Oh,” Fell said, biting into the cookie without a care. “From what Red told me, Richard hated surprises, he'd get so shaken up and afraid but Red never said why. Seems odd he would plan one for Boss is all.”

Blue nodded, tilting his head to the door that Richard stormed out of. A once peaceful couple fighting like tigers, and a personality change on top of it?

Something was wrong, but Blue just couldn't put his finger on it...but he would.

For Red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hm. Richard's insisting on going home. A man fearful of surprises or changes in his schedule decides to pop a surprise on his kid, then just leaves his wife to tend to the fit he caused.
> 
> Yeah sounds legit.


	9. Long Lost Twin Brother Twice Removed (and all those tropes)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Richard's deception is revealed, sending Red in a tailspin of anger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't leave ya'll with a cliffhanger
> 
> but also I kinda dreamed up the next few chapters so like it's just begging me to write them.
> 
> Richard: Gotta shoot your shot, huh?
> 
> Ding: Get out of my house =)
> 
> (Boss is being watched by Stretch, who is EXCEEDINGLY nervous about this toddling baby bones, but then Boss 'shares' some chocolate by smooshing it in Stretch's face and he is just enchanted now lmao  
> "I have taught him how to cartwheel"  
> "...all he did was roll on the ground."  
> "Yes, tis be step one!"  
> *he's excited*)

Blue opened the door to the balcony slowly, closing it behind him so as not to disturb the soft quiet of the afternoon. Red was on the concrete bench, staring out over the edge of the balcony, chewing on the cookie he’d nabbed. He sniffed, dragging a sleeve over his eyes. “How’d ya know I was out here?”

“YOU SAID, WHEN YOU ARE UPSET, YOU GO OUTSIDE.” Blue came over slowly, hesitantly taking a seat next to Red. The wind rustled the trees' leaves around them, dark grey clouds out on the horizon threatening a storm. “I FIGURED, WHY NOT UP HERE?”

Red snorted, clearing his throat. “You can remember a random thing I said a month ago and he can’t remember shit,” he grumbled, biting into the cookie angrily. “That’s fucked up, innit?”

Blue nodded, watching him with a frown. “PERHAPS…” he hesitated, winding his hand in his bandanna as Red scoffed.

“Say whatever it is, Blue.”

“PERHAPS, AH...YOU ARE DIFFERENT, NOW.”

Red’s eye sockets furrowed. “Waddya mean?”

Blue licked his teeth, not wanting to offend Red by what he was saying. “YOU SAID, YOU WERE YOUNG, IN LOVE, YES? LIVING TOGETHER.” Red nodded slowly. “PERHAPS...IT IS JUST PART OF GROWING OLDER? GROWING...APART?”

Red seemed to think it over, flipping the cookie around in his hand before he sniffed. “It’s just not fair,” he said, ignoring the crack in his voice. “He wasn’t like this before, Blue. He was silly and nice and…” he sighed, his shoulders slumping. “Do people really grow apart like that? Over the years?”

Blue shrugged. “SOMETIMES? YES? I THINK IT DEPENDS.”

Red sighed, cradling his head in his hands for a moment. “...I think you’re right,” he mumbled, the cookie crumbling a bit in one hand. “It’s just been too long. We’re too different now.” He sighed again, shaking his head. “It’s not fair on Boss to have us fighting like wildcats...but it’s also not fair to take his dad away from him.” He peeked up, tapping his foot in agitation. “We’ll figure it out, right?”

“RIGHT!”

\-----------

“What?”

Red flinched, his arms around himself as he looked away from Richard. “We’re just too different now. It’s been two years,” he grit out. “We’re...we’re not the same now.” 

Richard grit his teeth, puffing up a little. “What, over a little fight?”

“Little-?!” Red sputtered. “You looked like you were going to sock me any moment!”

“So did you!”

“We’re arguing again!” Red groaned, tossing his head back. “This is what I mean! We never argued back home-”

“Because we were at home!” Richard threw his hands up angrily, taking a step forward. “If we weren’t here-”

“Oh don’t start this again-”

“We’d be better off back home!” Neither of them had noticed how close Richard had gotten until he poked a finger at Red’s chest, to which he slapped his hand away.

“Don’t touch me!”

“Why not?” Richard growled, snatching up Red’s arm and shaking it. “You’re married to ME, I can do what I-”

“I THINK YOU SHOULD BE NICER.”

Something made a ‘schwing’ in the air, and a fencing sword poked at Richard’s neck. He glared at the stout Blue who seemed unconcerned with the glaring, smiling at Red who had fear leaking onto his face. “MWEH! YOU OKAY?”

Red seemed not to be able to draw his eye lights away from the hand clutching his wrist, but he nodded all the same. “Yeah…”

“What,” Richard snarled, tossing the arm from him and making Red stumble back with an ‘oof’. “You think you’re hot shit? Come on then!”

Red hit the wall, grunting as he scowled. “Don’t fucking fight in the hall-!”

But it was too late, Blue took up a defensive position as Richard stormed at him...then cleanly tossed the guy over his shoulder with his fencing sword. It looked rather cool, but Red was still shaken up by the fact that his _husband grabbed and shook him like a rag doll._

Like. That was so beyond acceptable. If he wasn’t so shaken he would be booking it out of there. Hey, he had a temper, but he also had self-preservation skills. He heard footsteps coming around the hall, which ended up being Ding and his father, both of who looked shocked at the scene. “Blue? Red?” Ding asked.

Blue frowned. “HE WAS BEING A RUFFIAN TO RED! IT WAS INEXCUSABLE.”

Fell and Ding exchanged a look and Fell frowned, looking over at his son. “Red…?”

Red’s eye lights flicked up to him, then to his ‘husband’ laying on the ground groaning about his bruised nose and pride.

Except his shirt rode up his back a little.

“What’s that?” Red asked, and they all looked over at Richard, who was shoving himself up as Red stomped over.

Richard jerked away from the hand gripping his shirt. “Fuck off-!”

“Fuck you!” Red yanked the shirt up, nearly ripping it off him and wheezing from the effort, taking a few steps back as Richard stumbled, obviously keeping his back from them.

But Red saw. And Red knew.

“Tracy?!”

‘Richard’ grimaced, backing up against the wall. “I don’t know what you’re on about.”

“Yes you do!” Red pointed at him, holding half of the shirt in his hand. “You went and got a tattoo of a dragon when you were 18, you’re Richard’s brother!” He started breathing faster, panic taking over him. “I can’t be-believe, I can’t…”

“RED?” Blue asked, a hand reaching out to touch his shoulder, but Red yanked away, shaking his head.

“I have to go. I want him gone!” He yelled behind him, stomping away as ‘Richard’ bared his teeth.

“As if! My wife and kid are here, you can’t just throw me out!”

(As Ding showed him, he certainly could, would, and did.)

\------

Blue found Red on the balcony again, this time curled up with his legs dangling through the openings on the edge. He didn’t say anything when Blue sat down next to him, slipping his own legs through the openings as he did as a child, relishing the cool air whistling over him.

They didn’t speak for a while. Not until Red lifted his head up a bit. “I’m. Kind of relieved,” he said, his voice hoarse and thick with tears.

Blue nodded, despite being a little confused. “YES.”

“It means,” Red paused, swinging his leg slowly. “That. Richard...wasn’t like that. That if-if-he ever comes back...he might be the same. Right?”

“MAYBE?”

Red nodded, his fingers digging into the concrete adornments as he spoke. “When we met, Richard didn’t talk about his family, much. Just that he didn’t like them. That they were dangerous.” He shrugged. “That was about it. But. One day, we were talking about something, and he brought up the fact that he had a twin. Thought it was funny.” 

Blue nodded, not interrupting him. “He said they used to do everything together, and snuck out one night to go get drunk when they hit 18. Tracy got a tattoo on his back. Richard chickened out partway through.” Red kicked his leg out, shimmying his foot. “He had the beginnings of a rose on his ankle. Used to say he was the Beast and I was Belle, then we’d laugh and…” He shrugged, looking away.

They didn’t talk for a moment, sitting in the quiet, and Red sighed. “It’s not fair to you.”

Blue leaned over, gently squeezing Red’s shoulder. “RED.” Red looked up, his face obviously wet still despite his attempts to cover it up. “IT IS...IT IS DIFFERENT, THAN AN EX, OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT.” Blue smiled. “HE IS MISSING, PERHAPS...GONE...AND IT IS UNFAIR OF ME TO ASK YOU TO FORGET HIM.”

Red sniffed, hiccuping. “I don’t want to,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “I don’t want to remember that sh-sham that Tracy pulled either, but I don’t want to, to keep waiting on someone who won’t show.” He covered his face, shaking as Blue pulled him close, hugging him tightly. 

“RED,” Blue gently cupped his cheek, Red following it to look him in the face. “I WOULD NOT ASK THAT OF YOU. PERHAPS, ONE DAY, HE SHALL ARRIVE, HOPING TO GREET YOU WITH OPEN ARMS, AND THEN, I WOULD BE HAPPY TO BE THERE WITH YOU, SO THAT HE WILL NOT WORRY.”

Red snorted, laughing wetly as he leaned into Blue’s hug. “That so? Ain’t gonna fall in love with me or anything?

Blue blushed, laughing nervously. “I-I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO PROMISE THAT, HAHA. WHAT ABOUT YOU, EH? ARE YOU NOT AS WELL GOING TO FALL IN LOVE WITH ME?” he teased, playfully nudging Red.

Red grinned, looking at Blue, shaded by the large orange tree nearby, curled up together on the warm balcony. It was a different energy than when he had been with Richard, or...ugh...Tracy. It wasn’t bad, certainly. The energy he and Richard had was just different, is all. But. He couldn’t deny that this feeling was warm, settling in his soul and lifting him up.

“Hm. Might not be able to promise that either.”

With that, they kissed, unaware of the chaos occurring in the throne room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'AITA for asking my gf to get rid of her engagement ring? Her fiancee died last year'  
> 'AITA for telling my husband I'm uncomfortable when he says his ex's name? BTW they were married for 13 years and she died horrifically'  
> 'AITA for thinking my gf should move on already? Her ex died and they were good friends but I think she should move on from it already, it's been a week'
> 
> YOU  
> ARE  
> AN  
> ASSHOLE
> 
> I cannot STAND when someone expects someone else to move on when their ONCE LOVED ONE DIED. LIKE FUCK YOU????  
> Like that's a wound that won't heal, like. They had a life together once, and yeah it sucks that they still talk about it but WTF ARE THEY GONNA DO JUST CHUCK THE PICTURES IN THE TRASH AND NEVER TELL THEIR KIDS ABOUT THEIR OTHER PARENT?!  
> Grow the fuck up and maybe feel a little proud that they chose YOU to include in their life and MAYBE BE EXCITED ABOUT HEARING ABOUT THEIR PAST??? jUST A LITTLE??? like this person spent a good portion of their life with them, or expected to!!! You don't just! Recover from that!
> 
> AITA sends me into a rant lmao
> 
> But yeah Blue knows that he shouldn't expect Red to go from widow to 'I love you let's never talk about my old husband'. Bc I need a character who doesn't stick his foot in his mouth pfft.  
> So while he knows that Red DOES love him (later on of course, they're getting there <3 ) he also knows there's a part of Red's soul that's always been taken by Richard and that he won't have a chance of touching. And he's fine with that! He hopes he makes Richard's spirit proud by doing right by Red and Boss, and he knows that no one can just replace another person. He's not trying! He just wants Red happy (and maybe get a few more kisses haha).
> 
> Also fuck Tracy.
> 
> Also small mini rant: fuck anyone who says you can't wear or do something bc they don't like it. Wear those boots! Go to that film festival!! YOU DO YOU, BC YOU ARE IMPORTANT TOO!!!


	10. Stress? What Stress?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know those moments in the movies where everything important is revealed all at once but the MC is like '....I'm just gonna walk away for a hot sec'?
> 
> Yeah this is that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New headcanon time \o/ For skeletons, once a child stops relying fully on their mother for nourishment, they don't HAVE to keep the ecto summoned! It's a great strain on the magic as well, so not having to summon it is a great relief and allows the mother to recover and have magic reserves in case something happens and their child DOES need their magic.

_”Richard?”_

_Said man jerked his head up from where he had been cradling it, sitting on the side of their bed, phone in hand but the light off. He sighed slowly, turning with a soft smile. “Hey, babe.”_

_Red yawned, shifting to turn over and cuddle up to his back. “It's early...”_

_“It is.” Richard's warm hand cupped Red's skull, and Red purred. His joints had started to ache, as they would over the course of his pregnancy, but he was still pretty early in it. “Babe?”_

_“Hm?”_

_Richard let out a slow breath, rubbing his thumb under the back of Red's head like he liked. “Don't let my parents see the baby.”_

_“Hmm?” Red mumbled sleepily, cracking an eye open. “What?”_

_“Just...” He looked down at his phone, which started to vibrate again with a blocked number, another slew of texts with various threats pouring in until he finally shut off his phone. “Please? Just don't let them see him.”_

_Red hummed, yawning as he nuzzled into the pillow. “Mmkay...something wrong?”_

_“Nah, just, me being paranoid probably.”_

~~

Red found the couple... _charming_ despite his reservations and the fact that they caused such an uproar when they arrived.

Richard's-and Tracy's-mother was elderly but looked a lot like a school marm, her hair in a grey bun and barely a wrinkle on her face. She introduced herself as Martha, and her husband, Thomas. They wore clothes one would see someone wearing on their way to church, a long dark red dress on Martha, and a suit and tie on Thomas. He had thinning grey hair, but many a wrinkle on his face and hands, his knuckles doing some ripple effect when he took the cup of tea in the foyer.

Once everyone had stopped peppering questions at them, they had settled down on the chairs and lounges, letting them speak. (Red had asked Stretch to keep watching Boss, just a while longer, but it seemed he needn't worry. Stretch was taken with the little toddler, happily showing him how to stand on his hands in the garden.)

“Oh that boy of ours,” Martha tutted, wringing a handkerchief in her hand. “Don't know what got in his head, but you can be assured, we'll punish him properly.”

Red nodded, looking away with a scowl, not wanting to hash THAT out again. “Yeah...thanks.”

His hand was being held by Blue, who squeezed it lightly, shooting him a smile. Thomas cleared his throat, adjusting his tie. “Yes, yes, quite. The boy's always been a drama stirrer.”

“And you know what they say about stirring,” Martha had a sly grin on her face, and Fell snorted in amusement.

“Yes, what you'll get is a foul taste.”

They chuckled lightly as Ding bobbed his head. “Sadly, ah, yes, Tracy, he is banned from here, he cannot come back, no.”

Martha sighed. “I understand, I don't fault you. He's always been a hard one to keep in line.” She shook her head. “No no, let's move on from that. I can't believe we have a grandchild!”

Red gave a slightly nervous grin, nodding. “Um, y-yeah, heh. I'm sorry, it's just, I didn't know who you were after he...” disappeared, he wanted to say, but the words wouldn't come. Instead he cleared his throat, shaking his head as he shifted on the couch. “He said he ran away from home and I just...”

Thomas nodded, a sad look on his face. “Yes, he was quite the rebellious child, he and his brother. Albeit, he was kinder at least.”

Martha tutted. “A kind boy, but hated rules.”

Red shrugged. That wasn't what he knew of Richard but he didn't know him as a teen either. “Sure. But ah, forgive me if after all...this,” he waved his hand towards the throne room, “Kinda makes me nervous about introducing ya'll.”

Martha nodded, smiling as she held the handkerchief to her mouth. “Oh yes, as a mother I understand. One must protect their children, until they know the danger is passed.”

What a weird way of phrasing it, but sure, yeah. Fell looked at him and he shrugged, so Fell spoke up, “Perhaps another day, after everything, the little one might get too wound up for Red to put to sleep.”

Red let out a soft sigh. Dad always knew what to say to keep him out of stepping his foot in something.

Thomas made a noise as he finished off his tea, letting the cup clatter onto the small plate. “Of course, of course! We wouldn't dare to interrupt his schedule.”

“No no, wouldn't dare at all.” Martha shook her head. Red gave her a nervous grin as they stood up, and she leaned in, gently clasping his shoulder. “As the Mother to the new prince of darkness, we hope you'll rethink about not moving back to the states. We have so much in store for him!”

...wait.

What?

~~

“My life has just been one weird thing after another, lately.”

Red had left the others to try and decipher what, exactly, she meant by that, dazedly heading out into the hall. Nope. Nope. He was NOT dealing with THAT on top of EVERYTHING ELSE.

Instead, he took his sleepy boy from Stretch, and headed off to his room, knowing Blue had appeared about halfway there.

They were laid out on the bed, Red's feet on the headboard on the pillows, Boss snoring on top of him, and Blue's head pressed against his, his feet pointed the other direction.

“YES. IS VERY...MUCH.”

“You're not kidding there.”

They stared up at the ceiling in the quietness, Boss snoring softly, before Red snorted himself (both out of humor, and from nearly falling asleep). “Boss? A prince of darkness? The kid cries if you squish a mosquito,” he muttered.

Blue chuckled, tilting his head back, pressing their heads together. “HE IS TOO INNOCENT FOR THAT. I BELIEVE THEY ARE...UM...” He lifted his gloved hand, tracing something in the air. “MM, DELUSIONAL?”

Red tried not to laugh too hard, since it bounced the sleeping toddler, but he couldn't help giggling as he rolled a bit, Boss laying on his side now. “I like that. Delusional. Helps me feel better at thinking they're crazy bastards.”

Blue smiled at him, shifting so he could see Red better. “HOW ABOUT...AH, A BATH?”

“A bath?” Red repeated, raising his eye ridge. Blue blushed, nodding.

“HOT BATH! UM, HOT SPRING? YES, VERY GOOD FOR STRESS RELIEF.”

Red hummed, gently rubbing Boss' back as he cuddled up closer. “Hm. You have my attention. Let's do it.”

~~

Idly, Red wondered if Blue was trying to flirt when he offered to take Red for a 'hot bath'. But he had to know Boss would immediately cling on since they had been apart for better part of a day.

(Which, by the way Blue was chattering up said toddler, didn't seem to slow his roll at least.)

They had to undress in a small locker style room, Red fussing over Boss who didn't want to take his socks off but they managed to get him to agree. Red noticed Blue kept sneaking glances, blushing bright as they opened the door to the hot spring. “What?”

“WHAT?” Blue startled, holding out his arm so Red could step over the rocky ground and sink into the water with Boss. Boss held onto him tightly, just as boney nude as they were, patting at the water.

“MAMA IT HOT!”

“It is,” Red nodded, adjusting Boss so he sat forward instead of strangling him with his iron grip. He looked at Blue who sunk into the water. “What's the look for?”

Blue blushed, clearing his throat. “A-AH, I THOUGHT, AH, YOU SAID YOU STILL FED THE BABY BONES...?”

Red blinked, then burst into chuckles. “I was, but he's completely grown out of it. My big boy, hm?” he kissed the back of Boss' head who squeaked.

“I'S A BIG BOY!”

Red nodded, shrugging. “So I ain't got nothing, so no use in summoning it constantly now. Keeps my magic at a rest.” He frowned, staring at Blue. “Why? You tryin' ta look?”

“NO!” Blue quickly raised up his hands, shaking his head. “I-I WAS...I WAS WORRIED,” he mumbled his hands slipping into the water. 

Red tilted his head, letting Boss pretend to swim in the water while still sitting on his lap. “About what?”

Blue nervously fiddled with his fingers. “A-AH, THAT THE STRESS, IT WAS INTERFERING? DID NOT WANT TO AFFECT YOU AND BABY BONES.”

Red flushed at the obviously worried tone Blue had, how now that he thought about it, the looks weren't probing but more searching, as if to ensure everything was alright. He playfully splashed Blue. “Doofus.” He shook his head. “Nah. Just him growing up, I suppose.” He pouted. “I miss my baby.”

Boss squeaked, tilting his head back and plunking onto Red's shoulder. “I HEWE!”

Red cooed at him, hugging him and rocking them both in the water. “You aaaarre!”

Blue laughed, grabbing a little ball someone had left behind and gently spinning it to Boss, who immediately squealed and started splashing eagerly.

You know, Blue was right. This was a great stress reliever. Didn't have to think about crazy grandparents or whether or not his kid was some prince of darkness hoo-ha, no more worrying about fucking Tracy.

Nah. He just let the giggles of his baby and the warm water wash over him, letting the world melt away just for a few moments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blue's inner monologue:  
> OH STARS HE'S BARE BONED! NO, BLUE, BAD, THERE'S A BABY BONES! ...WAIT! HE'S BARE?! IS HE OKAY IS HE SICK HE'S NOT HURT OH STARS-
> 
> He was going to panic lmao
> 
> Also Boss? Prince of Darkness? Cherish the thought.


	11. Date, Interrupted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blue takes Red out to ride on his horse. This is literal, and not in that way.
> 
> Pervs.
> 
> ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was looking up Italian traditions and found this article written by this lady, who wrote:
> 
> When Sabina was a baby, one of the first times I pushed her in the stroller I walked past two soldiers very seriously standing at attention guarding some important embassy, and one of the soldiers glanced at her and gasped in a high-pitched voice, “O Dio (oh God)!”, overcome by her sweet, tiny figure.
> 
> And I have never felt more connected to a stranger than I have to that soldier in my LIFE.
> 
> Same, bro. Same.

The good news was, none of this got out to the media, otherwise they’d have a field day. They already were about the ‘upcoming wedding’, and Red didn’t want any other craziness to go down.

They had also promptly avoided the other grandparents by making the excuse of ‘being busy’. He really had a hard time wrapping his head around whatever it was they were going on about, but thankfully they didn’t seem pushy. They were happy to wait (not that Red was ever going to let them see Boss at this rate).

He looked over from the table to said little toddler, who had gotten tired of eating and Fell had freed him of his high chair. Boss happily wheeled his little feet over to a guard, staring up at the severe-looking guard. Red wasn’t sure what he expected as Boss held up a little Barbie car he had gotten. “CAW!”

The guard tilted his head down, and sighed slowly, making Red think Boss was annoying him, until he spoke. “You are so precious,” he mumbled, nodding along, and Boss sped away, cackling.

That was fucking cute.

The first wedding planning thing they had to do was choose a date, which shouldn’t be too far out as the kingdom was anxiously awaiting it. Thankfully there were no big things occuring in the summer for Red or Blue, so they were pretty free. He did check in with his dad, of course.

“Of course I’ll attend,” he said, picking up the little toddler who had been begging to be held for a few moments. Boss wrapped his arms around his grandpa’s neck, giggling happily as they walked with Red. “I’ll have to have something done with the RV, I suppose, but I refuse to be an entire continent away from you both.”

Red chuckled. “Thanks, Dad. It’d suck, for sure.”

Boss giggled, pressing a smooch to Fell’s cheek and nuzzling up as they rounded the corner in the hallway, their steps cushioned on the dark red carpet. Fell sighed. “What are you going to do with the other two, then? You can’t avoid them forever.”

Red huffed. “Why not?”

“Because they’ll come back,” Fell responded, ducking through the doorway headed into the gardens outside. “And annoy you even more.” Red groaned, but his dad was right. He usually was. Right now they weren’t dangerous-not like Tracy was-but more...annoying...and he really felt uneasy about the whole situation.

But for now, he pushes it to the side, as it wasn’t...well, it’s not like they can break into the place. There were guards EVERYWHERE. So he just avoided it, for now.

Besides, he had a horseback riding date with Blue to go to.

~~~~

“Soooo, is this really how it’s done?”

Red hadn’t rode a horse before. ...well, he’d ridden a little pony as a kid for his birthday, but he’s sure that doesn’t count. He was up on Blue’s horse, Guinevere, a lovely white horse with an even temperament. Boss got to meet her for just a few moments before they left, and she allowed him to mess with her ears with nary a whinny.

Honestly, so sweet.

But here they were, trotting down a path Blue said he often took, Red in front and leaning back on Blue who had the reins in hand. He wasn’t sure Blue thought this entirely through as the poor prince had a bright blue blush on his face. “A-AH...YES?”

Red snickered, swatting his thigh playfully before shrugging. “You’re too cute. So, where we headed?”

Blue perked up, happily leaning over to chatter on about the small pond that he had found eons ago, and that it was a nice spot to relax and sometimes see little animals. Sounded good, and it was nice to get out of the castle for just a while. They had promised to take Boss next time, but Red was too wary about a small, not entirely in control of his own strength, toddler riding on a horse who didn’t understand the word ‘accident’.

Red had to deal with super strength from nowhere over the years...and teeth. Stars, the teeth. But for now he focused on their ride, humming idly as he listened to Blue chatter about how he had fallen in the pond once. Quite a silly story, if he was honest.

Which had been a fine ride, up until a man jumped from the bushes, scaring Guinevere. He had on all black, black sweater, black sweatpants, black cap pulled down with eyes cut out of it.She reared back amidst their shouting, stoutly punching the man with a hoof as he was flung to the side. The horse bounced back down, making agitated noises as Blue tried to soothe her, Red quickly slipping off, nauseous from just everything. 

“Who the hell are you!” He pointed at the guy, who was obviously now on the ground, groaning in pain, a-fake-knife now laid on the side of the path.

Blue cooed words at the spooked and irritated horse, then gave a sharp whistle. Ah, yes, their bodyguards who never seemed to really give them ‘privacy’.

Well. He was happy for them now, because the intruder would’ve had a nice set of black eyes had they not appeared out of thin air to assist them.

Stars fucking dammit.

~~~

The little toddler sat on the bottom step of the winding staircase back where his new bedroom lay, giggling at the man propped up in a red cushioned chair. Obviously he was under arrest, and was cuffed to the chair, but the adults seemed busy calling in the authorities to pay too much attention to him.

He started to sweat under the black cap he had on, which had been forcibly rolled up by one of the guards in order to ascertain his identity.

“Please,” he croaked, leaning away, straining against the handcuff. “I-I’m so sorry, they told me, they just wanted you back in the states! Please, Prince! I beg your mercy!”

Boss giggled harder. What a funny man! He got up, hefting himself down the step, arms outreached and giggling, smile on his face, flowers could have popped up behind his head in how adorable he was.

The man screamed as shadows, inky and vicious, spread out from behind the toddler, enveloping him with a hiss, no one hearing a thing.

...Boss was bored of this. He toddled away from the man who now was white-faced, wheezing as the rib that had broken from the horse’s kick jostled, his eyes blank from seeing true terror. The shadows slunk away, forming back the toddler’s shadow under his feet, light-up shoes bouncing away down the hall.

He caught the hand of a standing guard, who looked down into the eyes of the grinning toddler. “I WANTS SNACKIES!”

The guard’s lips twitched, and he let two fingers curl into the small boney hand. “Of course, little one. Come, Madre Regina is busy with Padre Re, eh? Yes? Come, away from the problemi in there.”

He took the small hand, and Boss happily toddled after him, other hand in his mouth, happy at his new ‘playmates’. Red, of course, had to scold the guards for giving in to the puppy eyes and feeding him treats.

(They still did it.)

Nonetheless, Boss was happy to be fed by the Chef inside, who was busy cooing over him and letting him nibble on strawberries from a cake she was going to make, the Guard nearby in order to take Boss back to his mother once he was done.

The man had been found nearly scared to death, shaking and stuttering as they shipped him to the hospital once medical had appeared, handcuffed to the gurney this time, two agents hefting themselves into the ambulance in order to interrogate him and see who sent him.

Red scowled, holding Boss on his hip as he stood next to Blue. “Well, means we gotta face Richard’s parents, huh?”

“I DO BELIEVE SO, YES,” Blue responded, arms crossed and looking severe, a strange opposite to his normal appearance. 

The man groaned as he was lifted up into the ambulance, and his eyes skated over the very disapproving looks he was getting, aiming in on the little toddler on the skeleton’s hip.

Boss grinned happily, then hugged Red’s neck and giggled.

The man shuddered, and passed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guard: I. I would die for him.  
> Guard 2: ....same.
> 
> Boss has already stolen so many hearts, the little baby thief UwU
> 
> Oh hey that whole thing was weird, yeah? Trying to scare Red off into going back to the states.
> 
> Hm. Eh, it'll probably like, blow over, and they'll neeeeever have to deal with this again.
> 
> Neeeeeeever.


	12. Dress Rehearsal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The wedding date gets closer and closer, but someone plants some misgivings into Boss' little head...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've recently found out wedding rehearsals are not at all what I assumed them to be. I thought it was like Corpse Bride, where you practice the literal wedding to ensure no mistakes or something. But it turns out to just be a lot of eating????
> 
> So I said 'nah'

Well, they didn’t have to confront Richard’s parents. At least, physically.

”Yes, ah, yes, allow the legal team to handle things! Yes?” Ding nodded, a group of three humans writing something on clipboards behind him as he smiled at Red and Fell. Red shrugged, hands on his hips.

”I guess that’s the only real way around it.”

Ding nodded faster, smiling. “Yes! And less ah, needing to use of the hands and fists when confronting. Just a restraining order.”

Fell and Red crossed their arms in sync with a ‘hmph’. Boss, who was holding onto Red’s pant leg, perked up and then crossed his arms as well with a scowl. “HMPH!”

Red snickered, leaning down and swinging Boss up onto his hip with a sigh. “Fine fine, no fisticuffs.”

”For now,” Fell grumbled as Boss happily waved goodbye so that Red could go and take him for a bath as Red spoke over his shoulder.

”Just lemme know how it goes, I guess.” He could hear them agreeing but right now he really, really just wanted to relax and forget about that whole…thing. At least until he could better address it…like when Boss hit high school age, or maybe after the wedding. One of two.

For now, he had bigger things to worry about, like the wedding.

They had to get fitted up for their clothes, so that’s where Red got bustled off to. A few maids and two seamstresses had him up on the stool, while another seamstress-a jelly monster-had Boss up on a little stool as well in order to measure him for a few outfits. Red twisted this way and that as the others measured him with various tapes. Really, two were yellow but one was red and was that a green measuring tape?? He grumbled a bit as one of the maids had him lift a foot, helping him out of his usual sneaker.

“Don’t lose it,” he mumbled and the woman smiled at him.

”Wouldn’t think of it, your majesty,” she smiled, placing the shoes to the side as they ‘helped’ him undress and into a slip and bra, which he rolled his eyes at. He didn’t fancy them-mostly since they got in the way with a very cranky babybones-but also he was mostly bone anyway, but the dress would fall if he didn’t have his ecto up and running.

Boss was having the time of his life, especially since his personal seamstress, whose name was Melody, was definitely someone who enjoyed working with kids. She was a purple jelly monster with flying hair that spread out behind her as she clapped, kneeling in front of Boss. “Yes, I bet you’ll just be the star of the show, little prince!! Ach, so cutsie!” She crooned over him while still managing to somehow measure his little arms for his clothes.

”I’MMA NIN’A BABY!” he squealed at her, making the others hide their giggles, although Red certainly cracked a grin at it. D’aww. Boss was so precious.

Red grunted when one of them wound some tape around his chest. When were they going to stop with this whole tape thing?!?

Boss had two little outfits made, since he couldn’t decide which he wanted more. A cute little tux with a clip on green bowtie, and a pastel pink dress with a bow for the belt. They managed to convince him not to wear the light-up shoes, and Melody got him some simple black ones that shined under the lights.

Red, meanwhile, was outfitted in a simple wedding dress. It had no straps, but a small little heart-shaped bedazzle between his breasts. It was really, really long, something he didn’t care for, and he fought about having to wear heels.

“But they complete the outfit!” Nadia, one of the seamstresses, argued, holding said heels by the tips of her fingers. 

Red growled, stepping off the stool with a small stumble. “I don’t care! I can’t walk in freaking heels, I’ll fall and d-er, get hurt!” He used to joke with his friends, ‘I’ll fall and die!’ but Boss tended to take things quite literally, so he opted not to say such things around tender ears.

Nadia sighed, swiping her hand down her face, barely avoiding her glasses as she tucked a strand of gray hair behind her ear. “Fine! Kitten heels. Compromise.”

”…maybe,” Red conceded, reaching out for Boss’ hand when the tot happily flew off the stool to hold his hand. “It’s just a rehearsal though, I can get away with no shoes.”

Nadia clicked her tongue while Melody covered a laugh, but they didn’t stop him. Boss had on his darling tuxedo, which Red reminded himself to take a photo, and let the others head out of the room, chattering to themselves about everything. (Probably the dress, Red thought, but honestly he could’ve dressed himself!)

Red sighed, looking down at Boss who had his fingers his mouth. “Watcha think, kidaroo?”

Boss giggled, staring up at Red with a grin. “I’S GOTS TIE!”

Red nodded. Well, he seemed happy about things. That’s what counted. Fell came in after a bit, dressed in a simple shirt and slacks, chuckling at the sight of the two. “My, your groom shrunk, Red,” he teased and Red snorted, shaking his head as he took the basket of petals from Fell.

”Hardy har har, Dad. Here, baby,” He handed the basket. “Remember, you’re gonna toss a few as you go, okay? They do not belong in your mouth,” he warned even as Boss dug his hand into the basket, giggling and squishing the petals between his fingers. Red sighed. “…none of them are poisonous, right?”

”Absolutely not. Now, come, they want to start soon.”

The wedding would take place in the Main Hall, which consisted of several pews now, a podium, long banners with their crest on it, and several maids and butlers bustling around to move this or that or clean this or polish that.

Red paused, hefting Boss into the pew at the back, pecking a kiss to his head. “Now, remember, when the music starts, you go first, mmkay?”

”YEH, MAMA!” he squeaked, giggling as Red stepped away, knowing that the guard situated at the other end would ensure Boss wouldn’t slip away unknowingly. For a while, Boss swung his little legs in boredom, counting the petals out with his fingers. One, two…one…five, eighty bazillion…boring…

He perked up, hearing what he thought was a familiar voice and standing up to turn in the pew, but pouted when it was just a lady and a man with a bandanna tied around his arm, the both of them moving some large table into view. “-but honest,” she chirped in that funny tone that Boss had found everyone had, “how long? Bettin’.”

The man set his side down, sighing as he leaned on one hand to rest for a moment. “Eh? Ach, dunno, married life comes in fast, aye?”

”Aye, but won’t be long,” she said, adjusting the apron over her skirt, tapping her fingers on the table. “Just thinkin’ ‘bout tiny tots around, tis be a nice thought. She paused, seeing Boss stare at them. “Little prince! You doin’ good?”

”MM-HMM,” he said, the basket dangling from his hands as he stood on the pew. The man laughed, slapping a hand on the table.

“Won’t be long, little prince, have a lot of siblings runnin’ around.” He nodded, grinning. “Make sure ya don’t do nothin’ bad, or they’ll ship ya out!”

…what?

The lady slapped his arm, hard, making him hiss and whine as she glared at him. “That’s,” she hissed a word Boss couldn’t hear, “rude, you don’t say that!” She turned, smiling at Boss softly. “They wouldn’t, dear, not at all, don’t listen to him, he’s got a pea in his skull.” She shot the other a glare, and he grumbled, grunting something about having to move the table.

But…the damage had been done. Boss stood there, thinking. If Ninja and Mama had babies…they would send Boss away? To the mean people they kept talking about? Oh no…he didn’t want that…but…

His thoughts, as scattered as they were, were interrupted as a soft organ started up. Oh. Right. He had to…okay.

He didn’t feel as excited now, slowly stomping down the carpet and tossing a petal here and there. Earlier, he wanted to throw fistfuls of them, but now he was too upset to do so. He held up the basket as he toddled to the side, pouting a bit as Ninja had shown up, not caring that they matched in tuxedos when he usually would have been excited. Ninja kept looking over nervously, but Boss didn’t look, crossing his arms angrily.

Finally, the door opened, revealing Red and Fell. Fell had his arm hooked with Red’s as he led him down the aisle, albeit Red didn’t have the veil, and Fell certainly wasn’t dressed for the occasion. For now, someone off to the side would quickly whisper to them how fast to walk or when to slow down.

Boss wasn’t sure when they finally made it, but it took forever! His grandpa stepped to the side now that his duty was done, looking down at the toddler curiously. “Boss?” he whispered, settling into the pew since he certainly couldn’t kneel down any longer. “What’s the matter, baby?”

Boss shrugged, kicking at the carpet as the two at the podium started to chat with the man behind the podium, who was pointing out something in a large book, and telling them when and what to say. “MMM, MAMA GON’ HAVE NIN’A BABIES.”

Fell blinked, stifling a snort as he nodded. “P-Perhaps,” he cleared his throat. “But ah, not for a while. Why are you thinking about that?”

Boss whined when Fell gently patted his head, twisting away and stomping his foot. “NO NO NO!” he squealed, his little hands tugging fiercely at the collar of his tuxedo. Red and Blue looked over, Red taking a step away.

”Boss? What’s wrong? C’mere, baby-”

”NO!” Boss squealed angrily. A maid near the doorway jumped with a gasp as a lightbulb burst, and without anyone seeing, shadows started to gather across the large, arched ceiling as Boss stomped his feet. “NO BABIES AN’ NO SEND ME AWAY!"

”Send you-” Red sputtered, completely ignoring the fact that he’d dirty the dress as he kneeled down near Boss, careful to avoid his tantrum-backed fists. “Why would we-we wouldn’t send you away.” He didn’t know how to respond to that, and looked at Fell and Blue in confusion.

Blue nodded, leaning down on one knee with a smile. “YES YES, NONE OF THAT! NO NO, YOU LIVE HERE, YES? WHERE WOULD YOU GO?”

Boss whined even as the shadows started to slip away slowly, and he swung his hands around angrily. “NO!” he screamed out, and glared at Blue…

…then broke down crying when Blue opened his arms up for a hug, sobbing into his shoulder as all those large feelings just bubbled up under his chest and he didn’t know how to deal with it. Red sighed, reaching over and rubbing Boss’ back gently as Blue started to hum a simple song, kissing Boss’ head. “YES, YOU BELONG WITH MAMA, YES? MAMA WOULDN’T LEAVE YOU ALONE!”

”Sure wouldn’t,” Red mumbled, shooting a look to the priest who nodded, shutting the book. No rehearsal could be done right now.

In the back, a man with a bandanna around his arm sunk deeper into his shirt as the woman next to him elbowed him in the side hard enough to bruise. He jumped as something behind him stung the small of his back, but when he turned, there was nothing.

The shadows slunk away, but teemed at the edges, ready for whatever came next.

~~

“I…STAY HEWE,” Boss hiccuped in Blue’s arms, being rocked in the rocker and tugging at Blue’s tie. “FOWEVAH.”

”INDEED, FOREVER, YES,” Blue hummed, rubbing Boss’ back slowly. He hadn’t let him go since the disaster an hour earlier, and Red had suggested he take Boss and rock him, as that generally helped him and ‘his much too big feelings’ as Red put it. The lights were dimmed, giving it a sort of warm and cozy glow to the room. “WHAT MADE YOU THINK OTHERWISE?”

Boss shrugged, then pouted. “IF BABY,” he squeaked, “I STAY HEWE?”

Blue chuckled, kissing the little hand near his tie and holding it gently. “IF BABY, YOU SHALL STAY HERE, YES. AFTER ALL, MAMA WOULD BE SAD WITHOUT YOU, AND BABY WOULD NOT HAVE THE BEST BIG BROTHER!”

Boss blinked, scrubbing at his teary-eyed face as he giggled, sitting up on Blue’s lap with his tongue out. “MMM. MY MAMA!” Blue nodded, not sure where Boss was going with this as he watched the little hand pap his cheek. “BUT, YOU CAN KISS. ONCE!”

Blue stifled the laugh threatening to bubble up in his chest as he kissed the little hand on his cheek. “WHY THANK YOU, LITTLE BABY BONES. YOU SEE, I THINK, MAMA CAN SHARE US BOTH, YES?”

Boss blinked, frowning. “NO?”

Blue hummed, nodding slowly. “THEN, HOW ABOUT, I SHARE YOU WITH MAMA! YOU MY BABY NOW!” he teased, kissing over Boss’ face and making him squeal and laugh, patting at Blue in fake anger.

”NO, NIN’A! NO! NYEH! MAMA, HEEELP!” But there was no anger or sadness behind the words, instead, he seemed to be a giggling bundle of bones, now settled down from whatever had stirred him up from earlier. Red had appeared, sans the dress and wearing an old hoodie and shorts, looking tired as he smiled.

”Hmm, I dunno, Ninja sure looks tough,” he grinned as Boss gasped and patted at Blue’s cheeks with wide eyes.

”NIN’A TOUGH…” he cooed, giggling as Blue leaned back in the rocker, chuckling.

”YES! AH, YES, RED? EVERYTHING OKAY?”

Red sighed, coming over and pecking a kiss to Boss’ head, who seemed happy but exhausted as he leaned on Blue’s shoulder, sucking on his thumb. “I’ll tell you later. This little one is in desperate need of a nap.”

Boss whined, but he easily slunk into sleep with Blue rocking him slowly and humming a silly song with lots of high notes to it. 

Ninja Daddy was the best…

(The man, Kye, was gently rebuked by Ding, and then harshly torn into by an enraged Mama Bear. He agreed that it was a horrible thing to have said, and that he was merely teasing, but even Kinsley-the lady who had helped him lift the table-had told him it was a bad idea to say it to an impressionable, and literal, toddler.

That night, Kye went to take a shower, but the water stung on his back. He couldn’t figure out what it was, so he stepped back out, twisting around to his mirror to try and look over his shoulder.

There, on the small of his back, three large welted stripes raised up against his dark skin. They glowed a dismal red, and felt hot to the touch, and made him nauseated to touch the edges.

He was out of work for two days until he finally healed from whatever he had scraped against. Kinsley teased him it was revenge for making the rehearsal have to be rescheduled, and he scoffed, blowing it off.

It was just a coincidence, right?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> o to be a toddler whose emotions depend on the hour of the day, the weather, and whether Mercury is in retrograde.
> 
> also telling a kid, even jokingly, that they're gonna be replaced or shipped off when a new sibling comes along is a shitty joke to make and I've heard it said a few times IRL and online and it's like  
> hey what a fun way to make the older kid hate their younger siblings!!! Good job!!!!
> 
> hmmmm Boss' powers sure are....interesting.......=) I'm sure it'll do absolutely nothing more in the future
> 
> Nothing  
> More


	13. Party All Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bachelor(ette) Parties are had. They're not too wild, but like, you can't get too wild when you got a toddler at home lmao.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had an idea. But the ending came out of nowhere so....

Red didn’t have a ‘bachelorette party’ when he first got married. They didn’t have much of really anything like this, but they made the most of it. But he wouldn’t begrudge Blue a bachelor party, so with a kiss and a muttered promise not to party _too_ wild, Blue was swept away by some friends of his and Stretch’s.

His own party was going to be with a few of the maids, and his dad of course, and his baby. Which, of course he didn’t mind, but said baby was pouty as his ‘nin’a daddy’ went away without him.

So cute!

Besides, he trusted Blue not to get in over his head, and Stretch to keep things in line.

(Plus, let’s be real, he knew there’d be questionable activities there not meant for young bones’ eyes. He couldn’t begrudge Blue that either, if only because the idea of Blue even *trying* to flirt with someone else sent up an image of a blushing stuttering skeleton, which made him wheeze in laughter. Yeah, right, haha. Still, let the boys have their fun. Red was promised a future night to get happily drunk anyway.)

Their party was, at first, a little bit boring. Well, maybe not for Boss. The maids were enthralled with him and kept cooing at him, making him happy with this chain of events. If Red was honest, he was a little tired and didn’t quite feel up to partying, except his dad-and Ding-brought them a three layer chocolate cake and…well…you know, he was in the mood now!

He did have to (slightly) scold the maids for sneaking extra bites to Boss (who had already sloppily ate a huge slice). “If he eats too much sugar, he’ll get wound up,” he groused as he wiped at the squirmy tot’s face.

One of the maids, Lizette, a human with a long lock of brown hair in a braid, covered her mouth as she giggled. “Ah, my mother would say, running around the house would help wind one down.” 

Red snorted, pecking a kiss to Boss’ head as the tot pouted at the loss of the frosting on his face. “That so? Like what?”

Another maid, Chil, a Snowdrake monster with an icicle earring that clinked with each movement, clapped her wings together. “I used to take the boys sledding in the Winter! Ah, no sleds around, sadly, but that was fun.”

Lizette hummed, nodding as she tapped her chin in thought. “Ah, well, you see, my brother and I used to…go down…” She motioned at the stairs around the corner and Red shrugged.

”What?”

”Ah, like…sledding in a way? We would often be scolded,” she laughed. “Mattresses are not meant for that!”

Chil chittered along with her while Red tilted his head in thought, then shrugged. “Why not? Sounds kinda fun.” He tickled Boss’ side, making the toddler giggle as he stood up. “Besides, if we go down like…just a few steps, it won’t be dangerous, right?”

They agreed strongly with him, and headed off to go and make some mischief.

Red had on a simple night shirt and pajama pants, while Boss was in his Iron Man zip suit. The maids at first had been in work clothes but Red had insisted they be comfortable too so they went and changed into simple nightgowns.

“What are you all doing?”

Red paused from the small landing of the stairs as they all turned their heads up to face Fell, who seemed vaguely amused but confused at the same time. Boss had a little plastic helmet on and two pillows strapped to him, his arms waving eagerly while sitting on a large mattress.

”…somethin’.”

”Son, please,” he sighed and shook his head. “I suppose my real question is why.”

”Lizette said she used to do it as a kid, and we didn’t have stairs at home,” he shrugged. “Why not?”

Fell seemed to think it over, tutting. “Well…I…suppose,” he agreed grudgingly and Boss squealed, waving his tiny hands. 

”GWAN’PA, GONNA GO WEE!!!”

And ‘wee’ he did go, albeit with Red right behind him holding him in his lap. The mattress bumped a few times down the stairs, which while making them both laugh, Red realized that it was not too good on the old pelvis. Instead, he encouraged the other two to go down instead (and keep Boss safe from being vaulted across the room) while he…snuck a few more bites of chocolate cake.

It was only fair. It was his party after all!

Idly, he wondered how Blue was faring…

~~

Red stirred awake as he heard the door to their room open slightly. He yawned in the darkness, the little nightlight of Boss’ providing just a small aura near his tiny bed. Which, surprisingly, he wanted to sleep in tonight (he thinks it was the whole ‘what a big boy you are!’ bolstering the two ladies gave him…his baby was growing up so fast!).

Red squinted in the darkness, hearing someone stumble over the carpet and hiccup, then giggle loudly. He blinked. “Blue?” he whispered, and the other made a very drunken shushing noise, his hand sloppily hitting his own face.

”SHHHH….YOU…YOU WILL AWAKEN…RED AND BABY!” he giggled louder as he plopped over Red’s lap, stretched out over the bed. Red snorted, stretching a bit and letting Blue lay between his legs, hand on his head.

”I will, huh? You had fun I take it?”

Blue whined, tilting his head into Red’s hand. “I WAS…SOOOOO LOOONELY,” he whined, smacking his teeth together as he swung his legs up onto the bed, otherwise not moving. “YES YES….AND THEN…I DRANK!” he whispered as if it were a great secret. Red adjusted them so Blue could see him instead of being in an awkward position, raising an eye ridge.

”That so? This stinks of a brother’s doing.”

”HMMMM,” Blue let out, his face planted over where Red’s belly would be if he had his ecto up, humming louder. “GUESS…GUESS WHAT I FOUND!”

Red sighed, leaning back on his pillow as he rubbed over Blue’s head sleepily. “What’s that, babe?”

Blue giggled drunkenly, grinning brightly. “YES, YES…SHHH, DON’T TELL…NOOOOBODY…” He started mumbling in his language, and Red could finally start picking out words he recognized. Something about a baby and happy and his name a few times.

”Well ya gotta tell me so I can’t tell anyone,” Red teased and Blue blinked slowly, as if trying to process what Red was saying.

”YES, I SAW…YES….SHHHH,” he whispered, squirming up higher and plopping down on top of Red, who found this entire thing hilarious. “I SAW THE PREEEETIEST LITTLE PONY FOR BABY BOSSY~! SO SMALL AND BEAUTIFUL! BUT SHHHHH,” he kept it up for a moment, his finger tapping his own mouth. “SHH…SHH….SURPRIIIISE.”

And then. He snored.

Red sighed, tilting his head back with a soft laugh, his arms wrapped around Blue’s shoulders. “I am so telling you about all this in the morning.”

~~

“Now if you need anything, just call or ask my dad, he knows pretty much everything about Boss.” 

Red handed over the eager tot to Blue, who was still blushing about the events from last night. Boss eagerly wrapped his arms around Blue’s neck, eyes sparkling at the idea of all the mischief they could get up to. Red had his hands on his hips, dressed in a nice black shirt and shorts with sandals. “The biggest thing is try not to give him sweet snacks, he needs either nuts or fruits to make up for the cake and all yesterday.”

”YES, OF COURSE!” Blue bobbed his head quickly, adjusting his hold on the toddler. “AND WE WILL SEE MAMA IN A LITTLE WHILE, HM?”

Boss giggled when Blue tickled his side, nodding. “NYEH! MAMA! COME BACK SOON!!”

Red melted at the cute sight, smiling as he leaned in and gave them both a peck on the cheek. “I will. You both be good, ta ta.”

And off he went, leaving Blue a flustered mess…as always.

Today was his party that included Boss, as they didn’t want the toddler feeling any more left out than he had at the beginning. Blue and Stretch had some old friends they invited over from their private school days. Swirlby’s family owned several candy shops, surprising of a fire elemental, however he was a bright blue which was a generally more upbeat type of elemental than their brethren, so it kind of fit him.

Muffet’s family owned several bakeries and had always been a part of the Royal Family’s celebrations over the centuries. It was only fair to invite her, after all, albeit Blue knew it was meant to usually be a ‘boys night out’.

What a strange phrasing, but ah well.

He settled down on the plush couch near his brother while Boss toddled off his lap and happily aimed for the new friends. Muffet cooed at him as he beelined for Swirlby. “I’ve brought carrot cakes and apple juice, oh and this darling passionfruit punch I’ve made with a tint of mint~ a hu hu hu~”

Blue laughed nervously, his hands on his knees as he watched Boss yank himself up into the amused Swirlby’s lap. “RED SAID NO SWEETS, HE HAD A LOT OF CHOCOLATE YESTERDAY AND NEEDS TO RUN IT OFF!”

Muffet tutted, waving a hand idly as she dug into a basket off to the side of her armchair. “Nonsense, I’m of the belief that the whole ‘sugar rush’ is something a parent made up to restrict sweets~ a hu hu hu~” She brought out a tray with tinfoil on it, peeling it back to reveal a layer of cupcakes with swirls to make them appear as cats.

Swirlby adjusted his glasses with a laugh, gently bouncing the giggling boy on his knee. “I’m not so sure I agree with Muffet dear, buuut….one more cake won’t hurt?”

Blue traded a look with Stretch, who was stretched out on the other side, and he shrugged. “I mean, sugar passes fast, right?” Blue sighed, nodding slowly. Perhaps Red wouldn’t be too cross with him…

Boss buried his face into the creamy cupcake, giggling as he loudly smacked his teeth while Muffet swatted Blue from the side. “And yet you never told us before the media found out! How could you,” she pouted. “I would have wanted to see a baby skeleton.”

Blue whined, running his hand down his face. “MWEH! AS I TOLD YOU LAST NIGHT-”

”As if I remember last night, a hu hu hu~”

”-THAT THE MEDIA TOOK THINGS OUT OF CONTEXT!” He pouted, slumping. “WE HADN'T EVEN HAD A DATE WHEN THE PAPARAZZI SNAPPED THE PHOTO.”

”Aww.”

Swirlby tutted, grinning as he patted Boss’ side. “Hey though, this means we get to see one still! If you hurry up and-”

Blue made frantic hand waving motions as Stretch started wheezing with a large grin. Boss looked up at Swirlby with a blink. “HOWZA BABY MADE?”

Swirlby’s blue face lit up purple and he frantically looked at Muffet who crossed two arms. “You got yourself into this, Swirlby darling.”

Blue shook his head quickly, laughing nervously. “BOSSY BABY, WHY NOT TELL THEM OF YOUR FRIENDS! YES YES?”

Boss gasped as Swirlby frowned. “Hm? Friends?”

Blue winked playfully as Boss squirmed and patted at Swirlby’s face. “I GOTS FWIENDS AN’ ONE IS LILLIF AN’ DEN DERE’S MAKIAL AN’ MOLLY!!!!”

Muffet tilted her head, chuckling. “Who is he meaning? There’s not any other little children I’ve seen.”

” ‘s his imaginary friends,” Stretch whispered playfully as Blue nodded.

“YES, RED SAYS HE HAS SOME FRIENDS HE TALKS TO WHEN HE’S BORED.” Blue smiled. “IT’S FUNNY, HE SAID THAT OFTEN THE BABY BONES WOULD LOOK AWAY AND START GIGGLING. PERHAPS A LITTLE ANGEL OR TWO?”

Muffet clicked her tongue, one hand cupping her own chin. “How sweet~ they’ve always said babies can see things we cannot. And animals.”

They laughed and Boss laughed too even though he wasn’t sure what they were laughing at, exactly.

In darkened corners, shadows moved. Two yellow eyes blinked, and the shadows felt a warm emotion wash over them.

Their Prince had acknowledged them, and spoke kindly of them.

They must be doing a great job then! They were proud of themselves, and thus they slunk away, leaving the cheerful group to their festivities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When my sister was a baby, she'd stare up over your shoulder and a lot of the time, she's start squealing and babbling angrily, one time she cried and couldn't be consoled. A friend of my mom's told her that babies can see spirits which was *not one bit comforting, I can assure you*
> 
> Anyway once she hit 3 it never happened again but I like to think Red is indulging this cute little 'imaginary friend' stage Boss is going through ;)


	14. To The Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Pony and Planning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what kid DIDN'T want a pony at that age???

“I honestly thought you were kidding about the pony.”

The pony in question was a beautiful snow-white mare...or ‘girl horse’ as Red took it. He hoped that was right. All the same, Boss was enraptured in the fat little horse happily nibbling on the green grass at their feet. She didn’t even twitch at his curious touches to her ears, only a small nicker.

Boss was patiently holding out an apple for her as Blue laughed, rubbing the back of his head. “YES, WELL, YOU SEE...I SAW HER AND THOUGHT, BOSS WOULD LOVE TINY HORSE!”

Red snorted, shrugging. “I guess. He can’t ride her, can he?”

“AH, WELL, WHEN OLDER, NO. SHE IS PONY, SO, ONLY WHEN HE IS VERY SMALL.”

“Eh, maybe later then.” Red patted Boss’ head as he watched in awe at the little horse nibbling on the apple, whinnying at them. “Ya gonna name her?”

Boss blinked up at him. “HUH?”

“YES!” Blue patted her flank with a smile. “ALL PONIES AND HORSES NEED NAMES! SOMETHING STRONG AND POWERFUL AND-”

“MOLLY!”

Red held in a ‘snrk’ as Blue blinked quickly. “...WEEELLL, MOLLY CAN BE STRONG AND POWERFUL, YES!”

“Good save,” Red whispered, both of them watching as the pony’s head lifted, staring at Boss for a moment before nudging against the toddler’s cheek. He squealed, giggling as the pony ambled away to a new little tuft of green grass, bowing her head to bite into the grass.

“Alright, so, what, she needs a saddle?”

“YES,” Blue nodded, happily lifting Boss when he held up his hands, bouncing the toddler as the pony started to explore the little paddock. “BLANKET, SADDLE. WHEN HE GETS OLDER, SHE CAN BE HIS RESPONSIBILITY!”

Red made a face. “I’m not too huge a fan of springing an animal on a kid, Blue.”

“MY FATHER DID THIS FOR US,” Blue nodded. “A HORSE WAS A SYMBOL AS WE GREW, AS THEY ARE HARDY CREATURES.” He slapped his fist against his chest, and Boss happily mimicked him.

“NYEH! YEH! PONY MOLLY!”

Red rolled his eyes, sighing. “Okay, okay, I can see I’m outnumbered.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “But really, no springing it on him. Gotta prepare him when he’s older, yeah?”

“OF COURSE!” Blue gave a dazzling smile, and Red gave in with ease.

Neither of them saw the shadow flitting away from under Boss, swirling underneath the pony and melting into the ground. The pony lifted her head, still chewing on the grass in her mouth, the black eyes shining with a dark intelligence one would not think a pony had.

For now, Boss leaned over and smooched her mane, causing Molly to flick her ear a him, and Blue let one of the stablehands take the pony to her new stall.

~~

Red leaned back on the couch, feet propped up on the footstool (it had weird little fringes underneath where it rolled, weird…) as he tapped a pencil against the paper. “I dunno, Blue, I mean...there’s not anywhere I really aimed on going anytime soon.”

Blue nodded, one leg tucked under him, dressed in a simple pair of shorts and a shirt as they were pouring over their plans for after the wedding. “HMM...NOWHERE IN PARTICULAR?”

“Nah,” Red shrugged. “I mean, had a few ideas here and there, but I’m pretty content I guess.”

“HMMM…” Blue tapped his pencil against his chin in thought. “AH, WHAT ABOUT BABY BONES?”

Red frowned. “Huh? Boss? What about him?”

“WOULD HE LIKE TO GO ANYWHERE?” Blue scribbled on his list excitedly. “THERE IS, YES, I THINK LEGO LAND? DISNEY WORLD? AH, SOMETHING ELSE, WITH CHOCOLATE…”

Red felt his face warm up at Blue being thoughtful towards the little toddler. Not that he should find it surprising, Blue and Boss were a tiny team of Ninjas together, so of course Blue would think of him. “Mm...something he can have fun at. Disney World is nice, but it’s aimed at older kids, yeah?”

“YES, THEN, WE WILL SAVE FOR LATER!”

Red snorted as Blue scribbled that down. “Okay, what else is on the list?”

“AH! PERHAPS, YES, VISITING A FARM?”

“A...farm?”

Blue’s bright smile flashed at him, so he had to think about it a little, at least. A farm...Boss did adore animals, and it would be a little calming, more than the hustle and bustle around here at least. “Okay, I’m interested. What would we even do though?”

“MWEH! THEY HAVE APPLE ORCHARDS AND YOU CAN HELP ON FARM, A-AND THE ROOMS WOULD BE COZY,” Blue blushed at that and Red winked, snickering.

“Cute. Mm, you know, that does sound nice. Get outta here for a while from people taking our photos.” He stretched, plopping the paper and pencil on the table nearby, plunking his head on Blue’s shoulder as he squeaked. “No one around except the kiddo, who sleeps through the night~”

Teasing Blue was definitely one of his favorite hobbies right now.

But chilling out on a farm with no expectations sounded divine right now…

They just had to get passed the wedding.

~~

Molly was very quiet and very calm, despite Boss’ overexuberance. He was, after all, young and full of excitement, but Red and Blue tried to teach him to be a little kinder to the patient pony. He would brush her mane, and chatter in his little toddler language to her, knocking his head against her long muzzle, making her nicker lightly but never bucked or kicked.

That pony had more patience in her than anybody Red knew.

Boss crooned and cuddled the pony’s head, nuzzling up. “I WUV MOLLY!!!”

Red laughed nervously, gently untangling the toddler’s steel grip. “I know, honey, and she loves you too. Come on, let’s let her go and have a nap.”

Boss giggled, tucking up close to Red and waving. “BYE BYES, MOLLY!”

The pony blinked, and watched them leave the paddock, and returned to her gentle grazing.

Their Prince truly was of a kind heart, wasn’t he?

~~

The wedding starts, and Red is...well, he’s ready. He’s just...nervous. The last wedding he had-hah...for some reason, that’s funny-didn’t have nearly all these guests. They weren’t even really guests.

They were the people of the kingdom, with cameras and microphones and just...it was much more than he was expecting.

He had shooed everyone from the room to dress Boss himself, the little toddler was being clingy and he couldn’t blame him. Boss had opted for the dress AND the tux, so Red just slipped the coat over Boss and buttoned it up, letting Boss sashay in front of the mirror for a bit as he tugged on some shoes. He sighed, running a hand down his face as he sat on the small plush stool the others had left behind. “C’mere, baby.”

Boss squealed, rushing into Red’s arms and climbing into his lap, heedless of his pure white dress and hugged up sweetly. Red chuckled, rubbing his back. “You excited?”

“NYEH! IMMA GO, WOOSH!” He waved his arms around and Red chuckled, kissing one hand.

“That so? Ya ninja baby.” Boss cackled as he cuddled up, his legs swinging and catching in the fluff of the dress.

Maybe he was just thinking over it way too much. He’d known it was going to be a popular event, and he’d agreed to it...but everyone got hesitant beforehand, right? Right. Probably.

Maybe.

He sighed, shaking his head. No need for all that, he thought as he stood, letting Boss slide down to hold his hand. He had gloves on this time, and they felt rather fancy in his opinion. “Okay baby, you ready?”

Boss nodded, giggling as Red led them to the door.

Whatever the future held...well…

It can’t be any stranger than the past he left behind, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in terms of movies....I guess this'd be the middle? Def gonna do the wedding, but thought it'd be nice as a chapter on its own.
> 
> Blue adores the little tot just as much as if Boss was his own UwU and that is v v nice to Red UwU


	15. Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wedding happens. That's all. It's good times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're not a world-class cult until there's another cult that says 'oh fuck you, buddy' and bands together just bc they really hate you

If by some horrendous strike of fate that Blue would also end up disappearing, and Red had to remarry once more, he would strangle his future fiance if they dared to ask for a large wedding.

Just saying.

This whole circus of random affluent folks or other royal entities, along with the media and whoever else wanted to show up, was very much trying on Red’s nerves. Like, the pews were filled to the hilt, with cameras set up in the corners…

Correction: he might strangle Blue now for not warning him of this.

(He did, but Red did NOT expect it to be THIS bad!)

He could hear soft murmurings of the crowd, despite how quiet they tried to be, as his dad attempted to get Boss to settle down a little. He was very eager to go on ahead, but they had certain cues to listen to, which the little toddler didn’t want to wait for.

Red snorted, shifting Boss onto his hip and kissing the eager toddler. “Who cares about waiting? It’s not like they’re doing anything in there right now.”

Fell rolled his eye pips, shaking his head. “No, but these things have a sched-oh you know what, you’re right.” That was his dad, strict one second, until he realized whatever it was, was probably not worth it to be strict about. “Sure, let’s send him on.”

“HOORAY, NIN’A!” Boss squealed, as Red set him down with his basket of flowers, patting his head.

“Remember. Toss, no eating, and don’t stop to chat, mmkay?”

Boss nodded, tiny stars in his eye sockets as he toddled out through the door the guard opened and Red chuckled. “At least he’s having fun.”

“Mm.”

The guard kept the door open, just enough so they could see in but no one would be able to peek out if they looked back. The music started up in a rush now that the tiny prince had been spotted, several clicks of cameras echoing as he happily tossed two little petals here and there.

A human woman cooed over him as he passed by, wiggling her fingers glittering with rings at him as he held onto the basket with both arms. A buffalo monster dabbed at his eyes with a handkerchief as his wife, a ram monster, patted his arm. “Dear heart, what be the matter, hm?”

“Just so romantic-like, innit?” he blew into the handkerchief as Boss sped up happily. He started to slow halfway there, slowly realizing that he had too many flowers for the rest of the walk. He paused, looking back, then up at the front where Blue was along with the man behind the podium with a large hat and book. Mister King was on the front pew along with his new Uncle, and they peeked back at him curiously.

Hmm...ah! He had a brilliant idea!!!

Red wanted to facepalm as the little toddler took out a petal and headed to a swan monster on the inside of the aisle. “FO’ YOUS!”

“Oh, my! Why, thank you, little prince,” she whispered, taking the petal in her wing slowly. “But ah, don’t you think you should…” But he shot off before she could continue, and she traded a nervous look with her seatmate.

He continued to do half throwing and half handing out petals, several of the guests holding back chuckles and Red contemplating hurrying in, hefting Boss up, and just waltzing up to the altar to get all this stuff going.

Boss eventually made it across the red carpet to Blue, who smiled at him and went to say something but Boss upended the remaining flower petals on his feet. “HAPPY WEDDING!” Boss squealed, then toddled over to Ding who was busy ensuring one of the guards had videotaped the entire thing.

Blue’s face was bright blue while Stretch was busy wheezing from laughter. Boss, meanwhile, was happily cuddled into Ding’s lap, a thumb stuck in his mouth now that he was relieved of duty.

Fell chuckled, offering his arm to Red who took it with ease, now with the veil in place and contemplating slipping out of the shoes with no one looking. “Well, he sure can put on a show, huh?”

“You act as if you didn’t expect this,” Red sighed. “They better have gotten some good pics of my baby,” he grumbled and Fell patted his hand comfortingly.

The walk down the zigzag of flowers Boss had left behind was...well. Boring. Kind of. Everyone kept whispering to each other or taking photos or filming. Red wanted to jam that bouquet in a camera’s lens if it didn’t stop zooming in and out (he could hear it, and it was grating on his already frayed nerves).

But uh…

...but…

Richard was a great guy. They had a great life together. When they got engaged/married/whatever, all they did was make out at home with a candlelit meal between them and a ‘you wanna move in?’ from Richard. According to their state’s laws, they were married, and that had been that. Red had accepted the fact that neither of them were the kind to do big celebrations, but also they were poor (at the time) college students, no way would they have had a big wedding in the first place.

But seeing Blue up there, in his pressed tux, blushing bright both from the mass of flower petals scattered around his feet and from seeing Red, well...it...warmed his soul a little.

He wouldn’t forget Richard, he couldn’t. But every day, he fell a little more in love with Blue than the day before. 

Richard may not have been some big prince, but he mattered to Red. And it felt like, despite Blue being the prince, and in the future, King, of this land, all Blue cared for was this little world made up of each of them.

Well, and Boss. Red wouldn’t do anything or go anywhere without his baby.

They stopped when they got close enough, and Fell handed him off as they did in the practice.

(Was it him, or did his dad have a few tears in his eye sockets? Perhaps the lighting…)

With that, Blue took up his hand with his face burning brighter, and they both turned towards the officiant. He cleared his throat and swept a grand gesture out to the crowd. “We, the residents of the glorious land of Tirla, have come together to celebrate the union of the Prince and his bride…”

Right, this was going to take a while, wasn’t it? It was all flowery language that honestly Red could’ve done without. Instead, his gaze started to drift. Well, Blue looked extremely pleased with himself, so Red couldn’t help but squeeze his hand. An answering squeeze had him hiding a grin.

He could hear Boss starting to fuss a little and he grimaced. Weddings were only fun for the participants, mostly. He wasn’t sure what happened, but the little boy started to giggle softly, mumbling, and Red relaxed. How cute.

Then Blue had to raise the veil and he flushed, swatting Blue with the bouquet as he chirped out how pretty Red was. “Shush, you,” he mumbled to the crowd’s chittering.

Blue just gave him a sassy grin and the officiant went on with the ‘I do’s and all that stuff.

Then the kiss came, but Blue was hesitant seeing as...well...he was just a shy bean as it was, and with everyone watching…

Red rolled his eye pips as Blue stuttered, leaning in and yanking him by his tie. “Shut up and kiss me already, you dork.” And pressed their mouths together, Blue’s blush overtaking his entire skull as the crowd cheered and a few laughed, Boss’ loud ‘EWWW’ echoing as well.

Honestly, Red adored the guy, but he needed to step up his game!

Or Red could do it for him, he certainly didn’t mind.

He let go of Blue, who was dazed as Red put one hand on his hip, huffing. “Alright, now what?”

~~

The reception was better, because it included food and not standing around killing his feet in those damn heels. Yes, he took them off, don’t judge.

He was sans the veil now and had portioned out the flowers of the bouquet to a few kids who had come as well, including Boss of course. He was at the ‘head table’, Boss sitting on the edge of the table in front of him, happily spearing the cake on his plate fiercely. Red had a small glass of wine with his slice, and had one arm over Boss’ legs so he wouldn’t topple over. “Having fun, huh?”

“EH!” Boss squeaked, stabbing faster and cackling. Red rolled his eye pips, chuckling as Blue came back from schmoozing as Red called it, taking his seat with a flush on his cheeks now.

“AH, BABY, HAVING FUN? YES? YOU ARE VERY FIERCE!” he chirped, reaching out curiously when Boss held up his hand with the fork. Red was about to warn him when Boss smeared the frosting-covered fork over Blue’s hand, giggling before using his hand to eat the cake instead. Blue blinked as Red chuckled.

“He’s fierce, alright. Wipe your hand, goose.”

Blue quickly took up a napkin, wiping it off of the white frosting. “OH MY. VERY ENERGETIC, YES. AND YOU?” He grinned, and Red could see a bit of the blue magic dusting his cheeks again. He reached up, thumbing some frosting on Blue’s cheek and making him sputter.

“Full of cake and wine. Mostly drained though, didn’t know weddings happened like this.” He chuckled, taking up a napkin to scrub at Boss’ face and making the toddler whine and hold onto his arm. “I think we’ll all need a nap after this one.”

“NOOOO,” Boss whined, but plunked his head on Red’s shoulder sadly, pouting. Blue laughed, nodding as he tugged on his tie a bit, then undone it to let Boss have it as the boy made grabby hands.

“I AGREE, YES. VERY TRYING DAY. O-OH,” he stuttered, seeming a little embarrassed now. “A-ARE YOU GOING TO ROOM OR…?”

Huh? ...oh! Red had to figure out what Blue was getting at, and he chuckled. “I can come ‘nap’ with you if you’re lonely.” He grinned, make Blue squeak as Boss gasped, the end of the tie in his teeth.

“I S’EEP WITH NIN’A DADDY TOO!”

“Mm-hmm,” Red patted his back, chuckling. “Plus, we haven’t made up a permanent room for Boss, so we should do that, huh?”

“YES!” Blue puffed up, happy to discuss decorating. “IT SHALL BE FUN, AND WE SHALL MAKE THE WALLS LIKE SPACE!!”

“Sounds fun,” Red hid a yawn, shifting Boss in his arm as he leaned back in the chair, careful not to have the dress pulled down too low. “But for now, a very well-deserved nap.”

“OF COURSE!”

Boss yawned as well, leaning into Red’s neck and huffing sleepily. Red hummed, rubbing his back, and unknown to the both of them, his little eye pips flicked dark red before naptime overtook him.

His shadow lying against his mother’s body and the wall flickered from view with no one seeing a thing.

(They find the two in the hall. One speaking in low whispers, the other holding a vial in his hand. They listen, for a moment, just to ensure what exactly was planned.

Their Prince was still young, and still susceptible to mundane attacks, as was His Mother. It would be highly upsetting to Their Prince should something happen to His Mother and new Father.

A guard rounds the corner, and the two quieten down, the vial being hidden as they speak amicably to him. They mention the marriage, how fortunate the two are in love, how happy they are for the kingdom.

The guard leaves for his patrol, and the one speaking before comments, “It works on monsters? Skeletons?”

“Yes,” the other responds softly. “So I’m told. I don’t normally ask why but-”

“You don’t need to know,” the first interrupts. “Now, when they lay the child down-”

“You want this for the kid?” the second hisses angrily and the other man shakes his head.

“You were all prepared to poison the adults, what’s the difference?”

“It’s different,” the second insists and the first scowls, a great blubber to his cheeks as his hand clutches into a fist.

“You do it, the entire world is in danger because of that boy!”

“How the hell-” they start to squabble amongst themselves.

But the shadows cannot chance this. It was only a matter of time before the Rising Sun group had managed to squeeze themselves where they shouldn’t.

When the guard comes back around due to his patrol, all he sees is some shattered glass around soaked stone on the floor. He could have sworn he heard someone screaming for a split second, but when he reported it, his supervisor assured him it was merely overexcited guests.

Hm, he thinks. Someone ought to clean that before little prince gets a hold on it.

He takes a small cloth from a nearby table with a vase on it, kneeling and mopping up what he could before wrapping the glass pieces in the cloth. It stinks severely, and was probably hot as his fingertips sting now. He curses, stands up again, and walks away to find the garbage to dispose of, using a small radio to inform the maids of the strange incident.

The shadows, pleased and full of energy, also watch him. He was a nice guard, taking such precautions for Their Prince. Should things ever turn sour, They would inform Their Prince of how this one took great care for Him, and spare his life.

For now, they fled back, chasing down another hallway, zipping from vase shadow to the shadow of a maid to the shadow cast by a relaxing chair. Eventually, they wound themselves up into Their Prince’s Mother’s shadow, curling around and slipping up the back of the dress as he walked without notice, and melted back against the Prince’s body.

Everything was once more right in the world.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Red is either a cute subby sometimes brat, or he's a Dom who makes people fuck him 
> 
> And honestly I really want him to shove Blue in the bed and ride him bc Blue ain't gonna
> 
> (yet)
> 
> I may have to change the rating....I think. Hm.
> 
> God this is really turning into a combo of a Lifetime movie and anime-ish, huh XD cults are more HBO's thing isn't it...hm.


	16. Sexy Times

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bow chicka wow wow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just your normal everyday sexy times after a wedding, nothing to see here  
> if you want a cute moment tho skip to the end UwU

Red had always been the type of child to know what he wanted and did anything to get it. He blustered his way into learning physics, and he worked hard to get scholarships to the college he ended up at. If he thought he was right, he’d fight tooth and nail to prove it.

Maybe that made him a little stubborn, sure, but it was who he was and he didn’t take to caring what other people thought as much. Blue, on the other hand...he was very, very kind...and very much soft. Like. So soft. Which, Red liked about him, but dammit man, a guy had needs and those needs were being pushed up against a wall and kissed!!

Oh well. He could always do it for the both of them. No skin off his back, hah.

Well, okay, after they put the toddler to bed (stars above, Blue, stop being so damn handsome while cuddling the baby!! It’s unfair!!!).

The little ‘house’ in the middle of the castle wasn’t one that Red had explored, fully. Blue had brought him and Boss around to see something or another, but with everything rushing around, they hadn’t had time to stop and really have an in-depth look.

Boss’ ‘room’ for now was going to be Blue’s old ‘nursery’. Although, if you asked Red what a nursery was, he had a few ideas in mind. This, however, was more meant for an older child. It held a trundle bed of all things (which Boss found highly amusing and loved), the walls were painted in the shapes of constellations and planets (ah, the space pattern he had been talking about), and a window that let in some light with the curtain pulled to. There were a few old toys in a toy bucket, and books in a bookshelf.

Boss was happy to be tucked in by ‘nin’a daddy’, accepting a kiss to the head and a little nightlight turned on by the bedside table. It really did warm Red’s soul seeing Blue be so sweet like this, and how Boss dozed off quickly with just a gentle pat to the back.

So of course the first thing Red did once they made it to Blue’s room was pushing him onto the bed and straddling his waist with a grin. “Hello~”

“H-HELLO!” Blue chirped nervously, his hands fluttering around as if unsure of where to touch. Red snorted, grabbing his hands to place on Red’s hips with a chuckle.

“You’re so cute when you’re taking care of the baby~” he purred, leaning down and tugging Blue up for a kiss. Blue blushed brightly, giggling breathlessly once Red released him.

“Y-YES! WELL! BABY BONES, VERY CUTE,” he laughed, and Red snickered, guiding one hand up to his shoulder, leaning in.

“Mmhmm. Here, unzip me out of this thing~”

Blue nervously agreed, and Red could feel his hand searching around on his back, slowly pulling on the zipper as Red pulled him up, kissing him sweetly. Poor guy was nervous as ever~

The dress was finally open in the back, which was nice because it had ended up being a little tight (or maybe they did that on purpose). He squirmed a bit, huffing as he tugged on the top of it. “Which way should I-?”

“HERE!” Blue squeaked, sitting up fully and helping Red slip the dress up instead over his head. It was nice and lacy so he tried to toss it gently onto the armchair near the bed, turning a bit and catching Blue’s eye. Red frowned, crossing his arms nervously.

“W-What?”

This was...maybe the first time that Blue had seen his body? Admittedly, he was wearing that stupid lacy bra that the ladies wouldn’t let him leave without, thankfully the slip had been pulled up as well, leaving him in a pair of white long socks, garters, and a pair of lacy undies as well.

But like...well he wasn’t exactly in shape! He’d had a kid and...well, okay, he hated exercising. He had a bit of a belly, and the bra was a little too small for him, so Blue’s intense gaze felt...judging. Blue squeaked, blushing bright as he nervously brought his hands up, as if hesitant to touch. “YOU ARE!! JUST VERY BEAUTIFUL! I CANNOT BELIEVE IT!”

Red flushed, swatting one of Blue’s hands playfully before grabbing them both. “You’re a dork. You wanna touch~?” he teased and Blue nodded, nervously looking from their hands to Red’s face. Red grinned, leaning in and kissing him sweetly, pecking soft kisses over his face and making him blush harder.

He was going to be a literal blueberry at this rate.

He sat back up with a chuckle, cupping Blue’s hand in his. “Hmm, fine~ just be gentle~” he purred, leading Blue’s hand up to his breast, thumbing over the back of his hand softly. Blue squeaked, his hand twitching over the warm ecto, catching in the lace of the bra and pulling it a little.

“O-OH MY~”

Red snickered, hooking his fingers over Blue’s and slowly dragging the bra down. “Mm-hmm~ they ached a lot when I was pregnant. Quite sensitive~” he hummed, bringing Blue’s other hand up to kiss the fingers, grinning as he watched the other.

Blue seemed overwhelmed but eager to touch all the same, his fingers skittering over Red’s breast, curiously touching and stroking over it. He was so earnest and sweet, and each gentle touch sent a shiver of excitement down Red’s back. Red hummed, tilting his head. “What about you~? Want out of your tux?”

Blue squeaked, nodding quickly. “Y-YES! I MEAN..UM...YES!”

Red burst into giggles, leaning down to kiss him again. “You’re soooo sweet, Blue~” Blue blushed again but Red slipped a hand down his top, plucking at a button and then moving on to the next one. Blue’s hand remained cupped around his breast as Red kissed down Blue’s collarbone, nipping at the bones revealed under the shirt and adoring the little gasps and squirms.

Blue laid breathless with the tux open and the shirt unbuttoned as well, leaving him just as bare as Red was. Red hummed, trailing a finger down the length of bone, making Blue shiver. “Aww, you’re so handsome~”

Blue squeaked, giving Red a happy smile. “YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AS WELL!”

Red chuckled, leaning down for another kiss before sitting back up, taking Blue’s hand again. “Ready for more?”

A quick nod was his answer, and he happily smothered Blue in more kisses, their hands roaming over each other as if trying to mold themselves together.

Blue was a _handsy_ fella once he really got into things. Red certainly didn’t mind it, rather than pinching or being rough, the fingers trailed over bright ecto and hard bone, happy to trace Red’s form above him. Red’s bra was yanked up (and then happily tossed off to the side), but left the slip on, merely pulling it up to his thighs and tugging his undies to the side with a snicker. How lewd~

They both ended up half-clothed, with Blue’s pants merely unzipped as they kissed, their heavy breathing echoing in the room as Red rocked his hips down, both of them feeling warm and extremely eager for what was next.

Red sat up happily, licking his teeth as he reached between them, eagerly gripping Blue’s cock. “Eager, hm?”

Blue squeaked, blushing as he squirmed, bucking up into Red’s hand. Aw, he was so sweet with how he blushed and stammered, Red couldn’t help stealing another kiss even as he stroked Blue with ease. “You’re so sweet~ You ready?”

Blue blushed, nodding quickly, his hands fluttering before gripping Red’s waist. “I-IT WON’T HURT YOU?”

“Aww, you’re sweet to worry,” Red pecked a kiss to him, peppering his face in kisses and making Blue grin goofily. “But nah, I’m good, I promise.” He rocked his hips down, slipping Blue’s cock between his thighs. “See~ I’m very wet~”

“O-OH!” Blue still had a goofy look on his face, and Red snorted, shaking his head. What a silly dork. For now, he steadied himself, pressing Blue’s cock against his entrance, making them both moan when he slid down with ease, one of Blue’s hands tangling with his as he trembled around him.

Red chuckled, twisting their hands to curl their fingers together, kissing Blue’s fingers in return. “You okay~?”

Blue nodded, panting as he trembled under Red. “Y-YES! MM, MOVE? PLEASE?”

Red laughed, but easily acquiesced to his request. It didn’t take much for him to start up a slow rhythm of rising and falling back down, both of them moaning and mumbling each other’s names. Red groaned, squeezing around Blue as he kissed him, pulling him up a bit to squeeze him into a hug. “Mm~ hah, feels very good~”

“Y-YES!” Blue squeaked, blushing, and Red could feel one hand gently squeeze his hip, even as he continued to rock his hips. “MM, YOU ARE VERY BEAUTIFUL~” he crooned, smiling gleefully. Red blushed, burying his face into Blue’s neck and laughing.

“You’re too sweet, Blueberry~” He kissed up Blue’s cheek, making him laugh and stutter off into a moan as he bucked up into Red. Red moaned softly, rolling his hips faster, dragging Blue’s hand from his hip down between them. “Here, let me show you where to touch, hm?”

Blue quickly nodded, eagerly slipping his fingers against Red’s cunt, one finger grazing his clit and making him moan and squeeze tightly. Blue grinned, bracing his hand against Red’s belly so he could press his thumb against it again, looking up at Red with a blush. “YOU LIKE THAT? YES?”

“Mmm, oh yes~” Red purred, rolling his hips faster and panting, his thighs shaking in pleasure at each stroke from Blue’s thumb. “Ah~ very good~” 

It didn’t take much between the both of them, Blue was very good at figuring out Red’s sweet spot and using it to his advantage, and gathering up the courage to press wet kisses over Red’s shoulders and down his chest. It didn’t take long for them both to cum, making a mess of the bed and the clothes they still had on.

Sharing the shower was an event as well, muffled laughter traded for kisses under the raining water, Blue mumbling words that Red didn’t quite understand but he’d slowly come to learn bits and pieces of the language. The words felt warm and full of love, definitely worth more of the kisses he bestowed upon Blue’s face with a blush.

Red slipped into a simple gown and Blue traded out for a set of pajamas, quickly folding up his tux to set on the desk as Red plopped onto the bed (having switched out the dirtied sheets quickly, of course). He sighed, leaning back with a hum, before reaching up with grabby hands to drag Blue into a hug. Blue was eager to crawl into bed, a goofy look on his face as he plunked his head on Red’s chest, almost purring. Red chuckled, kissing Blue’s head and yanking the blankets over them. “No more big celebrations for the foreseeable future, right?”

“MMM~”

Red snorted, thumping his cheek playfully, but it seemed Blue was already drifting away, so Red let him slide. For now. He plunked his head back on the pillow, happy to drift off to sleep as well, the warmth of the room keeping them cozy and happy.

Boss, as always, is the first to awaken, just before the sun itself would rise. Red should know, he’s been watching and taking care of his baby since, well, he was a baby! So it was odd to stir awake to no one around...that is, until he heard chattering from the bathroom nearby. Curiously, he slid from the bed, scrubbing away the sleep from his eyesockets, yawning.

In the bathroom, Boss was on a little stepstool, a toothbrush in hand and singing a made-up song alongside Blue, who was also sleepily brushing his own teeth. Boss watched him, enraptured, and copying every movement he did, then pointed his toothbrush at Blue, rattling off a word Red didn’t know. Blue laughed and gently touched the toothbrush, slowly repeating the word. “SPA-ZZ-O-LI-NO!”

“Spazzaza!”

“YOU ARE VERY CLOSE, LITTLE BABY BONES!” Blue gushed, and Boss giggled excitedly at the praise. It was about a mirror image of how Red taught him the word as well, carefully repeating it a few times as Boss spat out a mangle in return.

It was the most adorable thing to wake up to, honestly, and he captured the image of them both in his mind to keep close forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blue has a kink and that kink is Red...'s breasts  
> XD
> 
> Blue also adores Boss immensely and that makes Red happy <3  
> little kids pick up other languages in a snap bc they're so young and their minds can make the connections, now TALKING the language.....I mean you really gonna judge a kid who says 'anyphant' for elephant in english for not saying the accurate word in spanish????   
> babies are babies are babies, yo
> 
> (I also realized I wrote Boss was ALMOST 2 several times which means I gotta pin a birthday down for him UwU)


	17. Packing Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Red's shop still needs to be packed up.
> 
> Blue finds memories.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got hit with an idea that I really really wanted to do then realized that if I did the honeymoon, it'd be like a week before Red (and you guys) would see it and Blue (and me) couldn't wait that long lmao!!!
> 
> Also while writing this I got a...new idea too~

Of course, Red hadn’t come over planning for a wedding and the like, so he had left behind quite a few sentimental items back home.

Ding had agreed that it wasn’t good to leave things be back there, nodding along. “Yes, ah, we send movers?”

“No,” Red said quickly, grimacing. “Not that, you know, I don’t trust ‘em or whatever…”

“MAMA SAY NO TOUCHY!” Boss squealed from Red’s arms, dressed in a darling set of overalls as he waved a sippy cup in the shape of a lion. Ding blinked, looking pleasantly confused as Red sighed.

“Not all of it is fragile, but the books can be, and I’d rather it, you know, be me handling things.”

Ding made a noise, nodding slowly. “I understand, yes, yes...hmm...perhaps part of honeymoon then? Can go after.”

Red shrugged. “Sounds like a plan as much as anything then.”

Of course, they also had to factor in Red’s crazy in-laws that would most likely harass them should they get wind of him and Boss appearing back in the states. It was quite easy for the legal team to divert the media’s attention. Oh how wonderful for the newlyweds to be going off on a honeymoon...ah, but...it should stay under wraps, you see. Why? Well...how will they ever have another little prince or princess with people bothering them?

Oh, of course, of course! It wouldn’t do to bother them in that instance. Despite the kingdom still unsure of Red, they did adore their prince. Who knows, in time perhaps they would see the new generation taking on the mantle of peace and serenity in their little kingdom…

Fell had opted to stay behind this time, mostly since ‘these old bones weren’t used to flying’. Red was pretty sure it was mostly to gush about the grandbaby with the King, but who was he to judge.

The airplane ride back was mostly uneventful. Boss had seemingly gotten attached to Blue and was busy climbing into his lap and off again to go rushing around the plane with a cackle. The agent standing guard at the exit would gently turn him around back towards his parents should he wander that way, sometimes taking out a small peppermint from her pocket to pass to him.

No sleeping tot this time, but he started to wind down as they landed, opting to let Red carry him off the plane, tucked under his favorite purple blanket and hugging a tiny stuffed dog as they got into an ‘unassuming’ car. Still very flashy for the little town, but better than a damn limo.

Thankfully the little shop was vaguely unharmed, pardoning a few roof tiles blown by some storm or another. An entourage of movers/agents filtered in behind them, and Red grunted, nudging the door closed behind them all. “Okay, so upstairs is our main stuff, but we gotta get the books at least in storage of some kind, or they’ll mildew.”

One agent, a tall burly man who looked more at home in an anime Red had seen once with his slick black hair standing up straight, nodded quickly, tilting his head at one agent and the rest scurried off around the shop easily. Boss squeaked, holding his hands up at the man and Red laughed. “Boss, he can’t hold you right now, silly.”

“MAMAAAA!” Boss pouted, but the agent shrugged.

“I can take him upstairs so he may show us what toys to bring.”

“Sure sure,” Red passed the delighted toddler over, nudging Blue. “You go help too, make sure Boss doesn’t have them bring a bug or something along with us.” Blue grinned, passing a kiss to Red easily as he went to follow the agent and a babbling toddler. Behind him Red started fussing at a few agents who had carelessly stacked some books together, not knowing one had very fragile paper between its covers.

Upstairs was not how Blue envisioned things, not really.

There was a sideroom, but the one he entered seemed to be the bedroom. It held a twin bed chucked to the corner, and a racecar bed meant for an excited toddler that looked fairly unused on the other side. Of course the room was dark, but the light being flicked on showed more of it. The carpet was a little dingy from being walked over often, there were several children’s books lined up near the car bed.

A rocking chair and a very comfy looking hoodie laid over the back of it. It faced a circular window with the window open a little, which Blue now understood the ‘bug’ comment as a little beetle crawled in, either due to Boss tugging it up or Red getting some air into the home.

In the other room, it held a simple kitchen and a table with a rickety chair. Some of the agents put on masks to clean out the fridge, as anything inside may have spoiled. Boss was still up in the agent’s arms, pointing at a little chest of clothes ranging from infant to his current age, babbling up a storm as they started to pack things away.

The agent, Luca as he introduced himself to the happy tot, nodded along with whatever Boss was saying as another brought a book to Blue with a confused expression. “Sir, we found this but it’s...not a book?” she handed it over as Blue frowned, staring at the cover.

“HM? THEN WHAT IS?”

“Ah,” Luca spoke up, having turned to see what was going on. “Photobook. Mother had one, filled with polaroids.”

“DAT ME!” Boss squealed as he pointed at the cover. It was indeed a little baby Boss all curled up in a hospital blanket, sleeping. None of them could help cooing over the cute image, but the other agent quickly headed off to help put away clothes as Blue opened the book curiously.

There were so many photos! Such beautiful ones! Red pregnant and dozing on the couch in a simple t-shirt and socks, a photo of a stuffed bear they had bought for Boss. A photo of him and Richard giving peace signs to the camera. Several snapshots of the baby once he was born, most of them the same: Boss asleep curled into a blanket, the only difference being his onesie in-between.

Blue couldn’t help the goofy look on his face as he turned the page, pausing at a fairly large photo.

Oh.

Oh…

“Sir?” Luca asked, having stepped away so Boss could grab a little beetle on the windowsill, squealing when it raced away. Blue looked up, smiling as he shut the book.

“IT’S NOTHING, YES. AH, NO BUGGIES!” he squeaked as Boss giggled harder, one little foot swinging as the chaos of packing continued around them. He did ensure that the clothes that fit Boss weren’t packed away but rather put into cases so they could take them home. The rest, Red would have to see to, as they were his memories to keep hold of.

The plan was to quickly stop back at the castle and drop everything off, then head right back around to the farm to start their honeymoon, the reason mostly being to ensure that everything made it there, and so that Red could still remain assured that all of his belongings were still together.

So, Blue took this opportunity to…

~~

~~

“Bluuueee just tell meeee!” Red whined, a blindfold around his eyes as he was pulled along down the hallway, laughing. Blue had a ‘surprise’ he wanted to show Red, but Red hated not being in the know! 

He could hear Blue laugh and kiss his cheek. “ALMOST THERE!”

“ALMOST!” Boss chirped back, having taken this moment to hop and skip beside Blue as they walked, counting his steps out loudly…

...and out of order. 1, 2, 8, a bazillion.

So close.

Red couldn’t help chuckling harder as they stepped through a doorway, and Blue held his shoulders. “READY?”

“Yuppers,” Red chuckled, stealing a kiss when Blue finally pulled away the blindfold and stepped away.

The room was the little living room with the fireplace and divan that Red and Blue had often stayed in, either to dole out how to plan their honeymoon, or debating the wedding. Boss would play in front of the fireplace with little cars, or he would be cuddled up close as the room was often a little dark, giving it a soothing feeling to it. There were various paintings on the walls, a photo or two of the family here and there.

On the fireplace there were now a few extra additions.

There was a small ‘bundle’ frame, it had three frames attached to one another. Two of them had baby Boss inside, and the bigger one held a very nice photo of him from the wedding. Another photo was Blue and Boss petting Molly, a sneak photo that Red had taken. One with Uncle Stretch.

...and then…

A very beautiful photo of them, at their wedding, standing hand in hand. Blue’s face was bright blue, while Red held a smug look. It was encased in a white frame, slightly bigger than the others, with the date of their marriage under it.

The other one was what really caught his attention.

It was in a simple wooden frame with a small flower carved in the corner.

It was a photo, one of the only ones Fell took of him and Richard together.

Both of them standing as close as possible, Richard’s arm wrapped around his shoulders. Boss was tucked into Red’s arm, but up a little, so that he was facing the camera. Both of them were smiling wide as can be, although they both looked tired as well. It had been once a lovely and flat photo, but ever since Richard had disappeared...well.

There was a small crease at the edges Red knew about where he had clenched the photo tightly, and he was certain it had been ruined over how many times he brought it out to cry over it (which he always felt silly about afterwards).

But this one wasn’t blotched nor was the glossiness affected. It appeared as the day they had gotten the photo from Fell, perfectly intact.

(Blue could see how Tracy had tricked Red so well. There were a few fair differences, sure, Tracy’s hair a little longer, Richard’s jaw a little more square. But they were very close in appearance.)

Red knew he had teared up but ignored it, sniffing as he reached up to the photo hesitantly. “How did you…”

“OH! BROTHER IS, AH, HE LOVES PHOTOGRAPHY,” Blue explained, leaning down to pick Boss up so he could see as well. “HE KNOWS AH, HOW TO RETURN THEM BACK?”

Red chuckled, shaking his head as Boss squealed and pointed at Richard. “DADDY!”

Red smiled as Blue gasped, bouncing Boss lightly. “INDEED, BABY BONES! IT IS DADDY! SAY HELLO!”

“HELLO!” Boss giggled, waving wildly as Red leaned into Blue, kissing his cheek.

“Thank you,” he mumbled, a silly grin on his own face. “They’re all really nice, by the way.”

Blue grinned, nuzzling Red’s cheek sweetly. “I THOUGHT IT NICE FOR BOSS BABY TO SEE HIS FATHER! WE ONCE HAD PAINTINGS, YES, OF ANCESTORS. VERY IMPORTANT TO KNOW YOUR FAMILY.”

Red hummed, watching idly as Boss pointed at Blue, squeaking, “NIN’A DADDY AN’ DADDY!!”

‘Heh,’ he thought, watching Boss giggle excitedly, waving at all the photos. ‘Yeah, good to know your family.’

(Sometimes, when Red passed the photo, taking a quick glance over, he saw...something in the photo. Something around Richard, like a shadow in his eyesight.

He couldn’t ever put his finger on it.

Not until much, much later.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wonder what couple in the entire Multiverse would own a farm...
> 
> we'll find out UwU


	18. Honeymoon, Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys arrive at the farm!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found out about the Spongebob Musical through a gritty AMV using one of the songs and I am *floored*

Oakvale Farm and Ranch, established in the 1800s by a small family of skeletons on a handful of corn seeds and one goat. Oakvale Farm and Ranch slowly grew over the years, monsters marrying in, or moving out, or being hired on to help out at the farm. Animals grew and died, produce was sold in more bundles by the year. Mother Nature, by use of storms, attempted to drive them out, but they stuck it out and won their little plot of land in the back and forth war against the elements.

The current generation tending to the farm consisted of Crop, whose family was the one to own the farm over the years, and his husband Horror, who had been a farmhand for a short while before illness struck. Unable to catch the bus in time, he was forced to stay around for a little while longer, the farm family taking care of him for the night. During that time, he and Crop had bonded, enough that he chose to come back again, despite no longer working for them.

Over time, they fell in love, Horror’s green thumb and Crop’s affinity for animals lining up nicely with the farm itself. Meanwhile, Crop’s brother, Veg, had opted to go the Doctor route and moved into town, also looking out for Horror’s younger brother, Sugar. Sugar and Horror were very apt to be ill, but Sugar’s interest was held in sewing, not farm work, so he lived in the city.

Tragedy struck not too long in their marriage. A bronco one of the other farmhands brought in from the city was very against their attempts to calm him, causing him to break out of the paddock and rush out. Horror, unaware of the chaos, had slipped out of the barn only to be kicked in the head by the aggressive horse.

Horror, now, is well enough pardoning a very large hole in his head that he covered in a bandanna or hat. But the injury caused a massive memory loss, which was compounded by the fact he was four months pregnant.

Their oldest was born at six months and the fear that he might not live beyond a day.

However, he was a fighter, just like his parents, and it ended up being many years (and children) since that time. Horror’s mind still tripped him up from time to time, but he no longer woke up wondering who was in bed beside him.

When Red and Blue arrived, Boss in tow, it was to a fairly large farmhouse with a scattering of people walking about. Most of them wore overalls stained with mud, giving them lazy waves, and getting an energetic wave back from the little boy between them. The guards had decided to ‘secure the perimeter’, meaning they’d be out of sight, out of mind.

Good. Hard to have sex with an audience, anyway.

Entering led them into a small room with three chairs, a desk, various photos lining the walls, and a large desk with a large spiral-bound book. A very old computer sat to the side, being played on by the teenager sitting at the desk. Every so often he would click, his light brown eye pips wide as he watched whatever it was on the screen. He had on a simple green striped shirt and his left cheek had a scuff of dirt on it. He blinked when he spotted them, sitting up straighter. “Um, howdy, you all here for a room?”

Red chuckled as Blue nodded. “YES! AH, CALLED AHEAD, I BELIEVE!”

“Kay, hang on.” He grabbed up the book, slowly peeling open the old and thin pages before he came upon one of them, nodding. “Oh yeah, lemme go get Mama.”

“MAMA HEWE!” Boss squeaked, pointing at Red as the boy wandered off and Red chuckled, lifting Boss onto his hip, kissing his hand.

“I am, but he means his mama, cutie.”

Boss blinked, stuffing his thumb into his mouth in confusion as a few people appeared through the doorway that led to what looked to be a kitchen.

A slightly taller skeleton appeared, an infant cradled in his arm, a toddler on his other hip who lit up at seeing Boss, and a small skeleton with light red eye pips staring at them from where he held onto the skeleton’s belt loop. The older skeleton-the mother?-had on a simple plaid shirt and jeans with boots, and a red bandanna around his head. He waved lightly from where his hand was under the toddler, letting them slip from his arms to toddle to Boss and Red curiously.

“Oh hey, you made it in time,” he smiled. “Name’s Horror, that big ol’ one is Champollion,” Champollion blushed, huffing about something under his breath, while Horror bounced the baby on his arm. “Amasis, Sabon’s the one trying to get ya to play, hah, and this’ Apex.”

Apex peered around Horror, then ducked back behind him as Red cooed. “How cute! So many little kids!” Boss was let down as well, staring at Sabon who was busy giggling and waving their arms up and down. Horror snickered, stealing Champollion’s place at the desk, hefting Apex onto his lap now that he was seated.

“Well, we both knew we wanted a big family,” he shrugged. “Anywho, let’s get all the business out the way, yeah? Polli,” he called to the teen, was busy chewing on an apple he seemed to have nabbed from the kitchen. “Make sure they don’t go off in there,” he nodded at the toddlers, Sabon busy poking their fingers at Boss’ cheeks as he tried to playfully bite at them.

Polli shrugged in response, but didn’t leave, watching the little toddlers as the adults signed papers. Red hummed. “This all your bunch then?”

“Nah,” Horror grinned, Apex leaning on him shyly to hide away. “Got two more boys and twin girls. They’re out with their pa, doing chores by pettin’ sheep and the like.” He spotted Blue staring at the baby with wide eye pips and he smiled. “You wanna hold ‘em?”

“A-AH!” Blue blushed at having been caught staring. “IT IS, THEY ARE JUST SO LITTLE??”

Red and Horror chuckled as Horror nodded. “They're not even a week old, really. Wasn’t your kiddo this small?” he motioned at Boss as Red shook his head.

“Ah, Blue didn’t see Boss as a baby, we just got married.”

“Aaahhh,” Horror said in response, adjusting his hold on Apex to lean over the desk. “Here, friend, everyone loves to hold a baby.”

Blue seemed to fluster even more but Red just grinned, shaking his head as finally, Blue had a hold on the little bundle of bones. They didn’t even stir, too used to being handed around possibly, and merely yawned, their tiny hand gripping the front of his shirt.

Horror patted Apex’s back as they whined a little at being moved around, hugging up close, wearing a darling set of overalls as he and Red talked a bit, digging into the desk for keys. Blue cooed over the tiny baby, almost tearing up as he looked at Red. “WAS BOSS BABY THIS TINY?? SO SMALL!”

“Um,” Red tilted his head, squinting in thought. “Yeah, a little. Didn’t feel that way.”

Horror snickered. “They never do. C’mon, we’ve got everything set up then.” They did a juggle of Horror taking back the baby, Blue looking just so awestruck by how adorably tiny they were, and Sabon and Boss led the little pack (until they got to the stairs, in which they held hands and Boss held onto Blue’s hand bravely).

Horror opened a door, nudging it with his hip since he now had Apex and Amasis in his arms.

The room was pretty cozy. It held a large bed with a multitude of various quilts, either handmade or woven, a few pillows, a large window with a bookcase, and a fuzzy carpet underneath. A desk was pushed against one wall with a hair and pillow on it, along with a small toddler bed to the side. Horror nodded at it. “There’s also room in with Sabon and Apex, if’n big boy wants ta sleep with ‘em.”

“I think he’d like that later,” Red chuckled as Boss spilled into the room with Sabon, both of them giggling and running around. Blue nodded, smiling happily.

“YES, THANK YOU VERY MUCH, VERY NICE ROOM!”

“Mm.” Horror adjusted his hold on Apex, kissing their head. “A’right, dinner’s in ‘bout an hour, don’t head to the horse ranch yet, but everywhere else is pretty safe for visitors without a guide.” With that, Horror spirited away with the two kiddos, Sabon perking up as they looked over at Blue and Red who were putting some clothes into a few drawers. Sabon grinned, patting Boss’ cheeks playfully.

“Mm, yeh? Yeh? P’ay?”

“YEH! MAMA?” Boss squeaked and Red chuckled, folding down a few of the quilts on the bed.

“Okay, but please don’t go off somewhere you don’t know. Okay?”

“Yeh!” Sabon chirped, hopping in place. “Gilly wat’h us!!” Their little teeth had a tiny gap between them, and it was just oh so cute! With that they grabbed Boss’ hand, both toddlers squealing as they launched out of the room, little feet thumping against the carpet. Red shook his head in amusement as Blue happily shut the drawer.

“DONE!”

“Good.” Blue squeaked when Red dragged him to the bed, having climbed into it and kissing him eagerly. “Kiddo’s off to have fun, wanna have fun ourselves~?”

Blue blushed, quickly nodding. “Y-YES!”

Red’s laugh echoed as they ensured the door was shut, while two little toddlers were happily speeding through the first floor, getting shooed away by Horror to the living room with ‘Gilly’.

Gill Sans had dark brown eye pips and thicker bones like his mother had. He had a nicely buttoned-up white shirt and slacks as he scoured over some papers on a table with a pair of black glasses on his nose ridge. He blinked when a tiny hand reached under the arm of the chair, poking him in the side, and he looked over at his tiny sibling and a new kid. “Uh. Hey, Sabon,” he quirked a smile. “What’s up?”

“Mm, Boss, an’ me, p’ay!” Sabon flapped their arms excitedly and ‘Boss’ bounced in place as well.

“P’AY!”

“Sure, kiddo,” Gill chuckled, pointing at a bucket of toys near the fireplace. “If you play for a bit, I’ll be done and we can play together, how’s that?” Sabon gasped, nodding quickly as they started to drag Boss to the bucket. Well, agreement made then. With that, he went back to his homework, a tongue peeking out in thought as he concentrated.

The bucket of toys contained some Legos, farm animals, and little vehicles. Sabon and Boss took to going around in circles with the tiny cars as they babbled to each other, giggling quietly in the semi-silence.

“Mmm...Lillif?”

“LILLIF!” Boss chirped in response, and Sabon nodded.

“Oooh...whewe?”

Boss giggled, placing a little toy doll down that stood up on its feet. It took a moment but a small shadow swept over it, and the doll’s head looked up at Sabon. Sabon gasped. “Hewwo’s??”

The doll gently bowed, then bowed again to Boss who clapped. “HOOWAY, LILLIF IS HEWE!”

Sabon squealed, and both of them started to guide Lillith into the toy log cabin, setting up a dragon, cow, and a little baby doll inside. Lillith seemed happy to appeal to the two toddler’s whims, sitting in a toy chair and then clambering on top of the dragon. They babbled and squealed as the little doll moved, the fake hair not shifting even as it moved its head up to look at the both of them.

And then the doll paused and the shadow swept away, leaving both little toddlers confused as Gill cracked his back, sighing as he stepped around the couch for his little sibling and their new friend. “Okay, you two, watcha up to?”

Sabon pointed at the doll. “Lillif!”

Gill nodded slowly, slipping down onto the floor with a sigh, crossing his legs. “That so?”

Boss nudged the doll, pouting. “NO MOWE…”

Gill looked confused as they seemed sad, before Sabon pulled out a plush dragon, eager to share it with their new friend. Gill grunted when they both decided to clamber into his lap, making the dragon kiss his cheek or just cuddle up. He chuckled, hugging them both lazily. “You two are silly. Mom almost done with dinner?”

“Yeh!”

“Neat. You two wanna play with a puzzle?”

The puzzle was a simple set with the alphabet in the shape of food, but they were so happy to play it, and Gill loved spending time with his younger siblings. It was no skin-heh-off his back.

It was here where his dad found him, sweaty with bits of dirt coating his overalls and hat, Bliss and Slate rushing to the kitchen with Chandler on their heels. Crop paused, a towel around his shoulders as he chuckled, staring at his second born. “Havin’ fun, Gilly?”

Gill shrugged as Sabon clambered out of his lap, leaving their half-asleep friend. “Daddy!!” Crop swooped them up, kissing their face before swinging them back down.

“You go on and wash yer hands, Sabon,” Crop shooed the giggling toddler on as Gill chuckled.

“I’m fine, Pa. Our guests had a toddler so he and Sabon were having fun.”

“Good ta hear,” he chuckled, patting Gill’s head roughly with a wink. “I’ll go tell ‘em dinner’s ‘bout ready. Wanna take the shortstack ta clean up an’ set up plates?”

“Sure, Pa,” Gill hefted himself up easily, only an inch taller than his father, and Boss whined as he held onto Gill. “It’s okey-doke, time to eat.”

“MMM…” Boss grumbled, hiding his face into Gill’s shoulder as Crop laughed.

“Ah, shy’un. Go on then, I’ll go get ‘em.” He sent Gill on, whistling as he made sure his muddy boots made it to the mudroom (he didn’t wanna be fussed at by his darlin’, after all!) along with the kids’. With that he took his time to go upstairs, quicky wiping away sweat and even ducking into his and Horror’s room to change out of dirty clothes into semi-cleaner ones.

Horror preferred him to shower off, but since they were so close to dinner time, a change of clothes would have to do.

There, that should give the couple enough time to ah, get all their ‘fun’ out. He knew what it was like to have the kids away for a sparse moment. Heh. Wait no, no time to think about that. He shook his head, plunking his straw hat back on his head as he whistled, shuffling out the door and heading to the guest room.

He gave a quick knock, holding in a snort at the sound of a soft snicker. “Dinner time, yer son’s gettin’ his hands washed up.”

“We’ll-We’ll be down soon!” called one voice, breathless and a twinge of laughter behind it. Oh good, he was spot on time then. He nodded, even if they couldn’t see him.

“ ‘s all good, see ya on then,” he whistled as he ambled on down the stairs, leaving the two slightly flustered and very content couple to quickly dress.

The start of the honeymoon was very sweet indeed~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so many kids!!!!
> 
> so here's my notes on them:
> 
> Champollion - light brown eye pips, 15, boy  
> Gill Sans-13, dark brown eye pips, boy  
> Bliss- 10, light green eye pips, girl  
> Slate-10, light green eye pips, twin to Bliss, girl  
> Chandler-7, green eye pips, boy  
> Apex-5, light red eye pips, they  
> Sabon-2, light pink eye pips, they  
> Amasis-infant, light pink eye pips, they
> 
> Horror should REALLY be chillaxin' considering he had Amasis like...a few days ago. Crop'll make him, no worries ;) and then they'll have another XD
> 
> I also love the idea that anytime a visitor comes they're *shook* by how tiny a skeleton child is and at first, Horror was like, super protective, but by the time he had the twins, he was like 'you wanna hold one for like, half a sec, cool cool, yeah real tiny, now I got a hand open' lmao
> 
> Anywho~ this was fun~


	19. Honeymoon, Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> DInner time and let's let everyone sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Babies <3 <3 <3 <3
> 
> And like...I totally get like...having to deal with fussy kids who refuse to eat their meal but like...jfc, what is the use in forcing a kid to eat a carrot when he says he hates it  
> like  
> if you go and say 'please leave off the lettuce', and the cashier says 'uh, you should eat what's given to you', would you not be angry and hurt???
> 
> personal story: I hate beans. Hated them as a kid. My grandpa was of the mind you eat what's on your plate. He made me sit for an hour until I took a bite. He laughed and said 'was that so hard' and was immediately angry bc young me vomited on his shoes  
> he didn't make me try them again so

Dinner time at Oakvale Farm and Ranch was always a rambunctious one.

It hadn’t always been so, normally it was just the two at first, perhaps a few farmhands who came in for a treat before heading out to their homes. But after a while, and a few children, dinner became a very loud time to be had by all.

Champollion loved fried okra, fried potatoes, even fried asparagus. He was Horror’s veggie boy, and eventually started to help set the table once he was taller than said table.

Gill adored sweet things; waffles, pancakes, syrup, anything!

Bliss and Slate were, unsurprisingly, as different in their food tastes as they were in appearance. Bliss liked ‘crunchy’ things; bacon, fries on special days, crispy veggies. Slate was like her father, both of them drooling at the sight of a plate of steak and potatoes, but she liked peas (unlike Crop).

Chandler often emulated one of his sisters, either begging for a plate like theirs or a combination thereof. Horror had been working to get him to make his own choices in food, and he seemed to adore carrots and mashed potatoes.

Apex was still firmly in the applesauce/baby food category, a little worrying but Veg assured them they were growing healthily, and in time would desire something else. They did like to ‘taste test’ cookies Mama made. Sabon was in baby food as well and often stuck their hands in said food.

So, it was a challenge getting everyone something they liked to eat, but not one Horror took on lightly. Amasis was tied tightly to his back, napping away as Horror bounced back and forth between various pots and pans bubbling away. Polli and Gill were busy helping the younger kids set the table, while Bliss, Slate, and Chandler were scurrying back and forth getting ingredients and the like as Horror asked of them.

When Red and Blue arrived, the family had already begun to sit down. Sabon happily sat in a ‘big boy’ chair next to Boss, both of them babbling away at each other as the rest were passing plates and digging into their chosen food. Red whistled, taking a seat Blue pulled out for him after kissing his cheek. “My, what a feast, huh?”

Horror chuckled, having adjusted Amasis into his arms, the baby stirring at all the noise as he sipped some water. “Mm, different tastes and likes, lots of family.” He shrugged. “Always get odd questions about that.”

Red raised an eye ridge. “Really? Like what? Blue, don’t let him do that,” he caught Boss about to squish his hands in the applesauce, whining when the Ninja caught him but Blue cooed at him and encouraged him to use the spoon.

Horror snorted, sliding a small bowl of mashed potatoes to Chandler. “Like ‘why not make everyone the same thing’ or ‘make them eat whatever you cook’. I’m like this, if I can choose not ta have beans and Crop can have his cabbage-” Crop winked at him with a saucy grin. “Then I think the kids get to choose what they want and when. What’s the point in makin’ ‘em eat if they don’t want?”

“Fair,” Red agreed, quickly passing Blue a napkin to clean tiny hands. “Guess I never really thought of all that, Boss is more of a ‘try anything once’ type of baby.”

Crop chuckled, letting Chandler climb into his lap happily and eat his potatoes. “I remember bein’ like that, haha. Even rocks.”

“Explains things,” Horror mumbled, making some of the kids giggle. Red chuckled, taking a plate of food and nabbing a roll to roll around in gravy. Blue was very eager for ‘Nin’a Daddy’ to feed him, and Blue certainly didn’t mind tending to him for the moment, cooing in his language at him and even giving some attention to Sabon who was curious about the strange words he was saying.

The kids chattered on, all of them asking Red and Blue various questions. Slate, the little girl wearing overalls with oversized boots, pointed at Blue. “You sound funny.”

“OH! YES, WHY YES,” Blue squeaked out, his wrist being held by Boss who was busy waving it around and making ‘pfft’ noises. “I AM FROM, AH, TIRLA, AND I HAVE ACCENT.”

“Where’s Tirla?” whispered the other, Bliss, who peeked over the table as if physically smaller, wearing a long-sleeved pink shirt and pink jeans.

“VERY FAR!” Blue grinned, pointing a random direction with his other hand. “YES, QUITE A GLORIOUS LAND, PERHAPS SOMEDAY, YOU VISIT, YES?”

“I dunno if Mama will let us drive that far,” Slate looked over at Horror curiously, who was busy hiding his laughter.

“Maybe when you’re older, sweetheart.”

“Oh,” She looked back at Blue, nodding. “We’ll see you in 20 years then.”

Crop choked on his food at that, coughing as Chandler started giggling, not sure why the adults were laughing but wanting to be involved. Apex had managed to squirm into Horror’s full lap, but didn’t seem to mind the baby sitting with them as they stared at the couple.

It didn’t take much for the two toddlers to get fussy and want down. Blue of course wanted to help and let them out, despite Red nudging him not to. Red sighed as they slipped off the chairs, giggling under the table. “At least they’re not running off.”

Blue flushed, grinning at him and Red couldn’t help to give him a kiss, making the younger kids ‘ewwww’ at them. Heh, they were adorable.

Well, adorable until said little toddlers, mischief-makers they were, had swiped their bowls from their trays and had decorated themselves in applesauce. They only knew because Sabon attempted to heft themselves into Blue’s lap, getting sticky prints on his pants and making him back up swiftly with a shocked gasp, and Boss immediately climbed into Red’s lap, nearly tugging his dress all the way down. “MAMA, WE HEWE!”

Red squeaked, quickly ducking down to prevent the stretching of the fabric (although he could hear it tear on the side), and one of the little girls squealed ‘EWWW, SABON!’, scraping her own chair back quickly. A shucked boot went flying, and it seemed that they had also filled her shoes with the food.

Again, dinner time was always rambunctious.

After handing Amasis off to Crop, Horror and Red managed to wrestle the very sticky toddlers to the outside faucet to wash off. Blue was apologetic but Horror waved him off, laughing. “Don’t worry about it. This don’t even rank up. Remind me to tell you about Gill’s friend, the Viper, later.” He rolled his eyes, chuckling as they headed outside. Sabon was happy to duck under the faucet, leading Boss to be equally excited as Red fussed with his dress, flushing.

“The band is snapped,” he grumbled, now no longer tight under his chest but flowy instead. “Sorry about that.”

“I mean, they’ve seen me feed the babies, nothing they ain’t seen before,” Horror shrugged, making sure to scrub between the little joints as Red took up a cloth, wiping down Boss’ skull.

“Yeah. Heh, ain’t quiet around here, huh?”

“Darn straight.” They grinned, quickly cleaning off the two squirmy skeletons, and back in they went, both little toddlers now absent their shirts. Slate seemed to be very insulted that they had dared to fill her boots up, but it seemed Crop had it handled as he was brushing at it with his leather brush, whistling away as she watched with wide eye pips, eager to see shining boots.

Blue perked up, easily taking Boss as Red stopped by. “COME LITTLE BABY BONES, HM, YES, TOO MUCH APPLES AND SAUCE.”

“NYEH, MO’E!”

“Nope,” Red chuckled. “I think you’ve had enough. How about juice?”

“JUI’!” Boss squeaked, slipping his fingers in his mouth as he leaned on Blue, giggling. Blue kissed his head, then kissed Red as he got up, sighing.

“WELL! VERY INTERESTING, YES. TIME FOR BED AND JUICE?”

“Time for bed and juice,” Red agreed, and they wished their hosts good night after ensuring everything was clean. Tonight Boss wanted to sleep with them, tucked close between them in his starry pajamas, and snoring softly. Tomorrow, he had made the choice to sleep with his new friend, but tonight, their little energetic tot was sound asleep tucked under a plush blanket in the dark of the room with them.

~~

Champollion couldn’t sleep unless he had a small candlelit in his room and wore a special set of pajamas his uncle Veg had gotten him. Gill had to have his door cracked a little, for a sliver of light, but otherwise, he conked out pretty hard.

Bliss, Slate, and Chandler shared a room. Bliss and Slate slept at the opposite ends of a bed, as they had once tried different beds but felt afraid of the dark. Bliss always woke up curled into the blankets, while Slate had her feet tossed over the side and snoring loud enough to shake the house. Chandler had his own bed, but when it rained, he would sneak into the two girls’ bed and doze away. He once had a soother but decided he was a ‘big boy’ and got rid of it a year or so back.

Apex was in the room right next to Horror and Crop, sharing it with Sabon and sometimes other guests’ little kids. Apex didn’t mind so much, but if their little nightlight-a carousel that lit up stars on the ceiling-went out, they would cry until someone came to check on them.

Sabon…well, they were a rock hard sleeper, just like Amasis is right now.

All of the bedtime rituals took a good hour to go through, but neither Horror nor Crop spoke against it. It was a bonding time, either both of them with one kid or individually. After all, Apex latched onto Horror, while Polli was happy to see Crop pass by his doorway.

Their own ritual now included a newborn, once more. Crop made sure Horror tucked himself into bed with said infant, sleepily sitting up against his old pregnancy pillow (so fluffed out it lost its shape) and humming to Amasis who was having their lat night second dinner. Horror had switched to an easy robe and cozy set of socks, and Crop had changed into a simple pair of pajama pants as he yawned, heading back into the bedroom. “Hey, kitten~”

“Hey, babe,” Horror mumbled, sighing into the kiss Crop gave when he shuffled over, snorting when Amasis made a nose at the both of them for daring to interrupt their meal. “How was things?”

“Things was good,” Crop grunted as he hefted himself onto his side of the bed, adjusting the blankets so he could slot himself against Horror, kissing his cheek. One arm was around Horror, gently touching a tiny foot that wiggled happily. “Bliss still likes the goats, and Slate and Chandler fed the ducks. Seems like we got a few hatchin’ soon.”

“Mm,” Horror sighed, leaning into Crop’s side, shutting his eye sockets for a moment. “Good, good.”

“Been a long day?”

“Mm. You know I just get tired easily after a baby.”

“Heh, yeah,” Crop mumbled, pressing his mouth lightly against Horror’s cheek, just keeping it there for a moment. “How’s your head?”

“Mm,” Horror grunted, he had pulled the bandanna off earlier but wrapped it in a healing bandage for the night. It kept any infection out and kept him from catching the jagged edges on a pillow. “Little pain, nothin’ bad.”

“You should take a break.”

“You first,” Horror shot back, peeking his eye socket open as Crop chuckled, leaning a bit to hit the switch for the light, a little lamp giving them a soft light.

“Actually, why not, babe? After our guests git, I mean.” He shrugged, wrapping his arms around Horror once more. “Veg and Sug can watch the brood for a while, and me and you, we can rest and relax for a few days.”

“Mmmmmaaaaybe,” Horror drawled out. It did sound very nice, although it wasn’t like they didn’t take a break now and again. But with Sabon and Amasis coming back to back, it felt like decades from their last quiet night. “How about you kiss me a little more and we’ll see~?”

Crop cracked a grin, pecking a kiss trail up to Horror’s head softly. “I can certainly get behind that~”

They both giggled softly into the night. Amasis found them interesting but after their meal, had immediately lost interest, content with going right back to sleep. After tucking them into their tiny crib, they settled down for the rest of the night, mumbling their love and half-asleep compliments.

On the edges of the farm, the security guards kept a watch on the quiet farmhouse. Farmhands trailed away from their work, giving friendly waves as they did so. All seemed well this night, and everyone slept peacefully into the night without worries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once upon a time, Jimmy Karfowitz from down the lane wanted to try his hand at being a farmhand. Crop gave him the job as they had a six year old, a three year old, and his darling just had twin girls, so every hand was needed.
> 
> Jimmy was happily talking to Crop, who turned and picked up the three year old named Gill. Jimmy told the little boy he was new to the farm, to which said little boy said 'you need pwesent!' and pushed a long belt into his hands.
> 
> Jimmy, of course, was immediately confused, but Crop chuckled and said something about Gill being into sharing lately.
> 
> That was when, of course, they both noticed the belt start to move.
> 
> So yes, a wardrobe malfunction caused by a toddler has nothing on that.
> 
> Also Red totally saw it coming. Blue's the type who instantly adores kids but also believes they won't get into any trouble  
> Red knows better  
> the quiet is when you worry XD


End file.
